Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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Add 26 Days to Your Year: Reduce Conflict in the Workplace

“If only I had more hours in the day.” How many times have you uttered those words?
If you’re like most people, you either think it or say it daily.
The good news is that we all have more time accessible to us.
The bad news is that we often let others steal it from us.

Consider this: International Communications Research in New York surveyed over 1,000 people on how many minutes per day
they are interrupted with things that they don’t want to do.
Over 42 percent of those surveyed admit that they spend 100 minutes or more every day on interruptions.

This breaks down to the following:

100 minutes (1-2/3 hours) per day
11-2/3 hours per week
26 days per year
5 weeks of vacation

While you can’t make up for lost time, you can have more time to do what you want to do – starting today!
The secret is to use Be Direct with Respect® principles.

Here’s how.

  •  When someone asks, “Can I have five minutes of your time?” the natural response is to say,
    “Sure,” even though you really don’t have  five minutes…and you know those five minutes will grow into 15, 20, or even 30 minutes. A better response is, “Sure, I’d love to help you.   Let me call you when I’m done with this project and we can talk then.”
    Now you’re still engaging the person, but you’re doing it on your terms and your timeline, not theirs.
  •  When someone tries to start a friendly conversation with you or engage in small talk and you don’t have the time,
    the usual response is to stop what you’re doing and talk to the person. After all, you don’t want to be rude.
    A better response is, “I’d love to hear more about your grand kids (or your new project, the new clients, etc.),
    Right now I have a meeting (or a deadline to meet, a report to finish, a doctor’s appointment, etc.).
    So let’s talk about this later today when I’m available.”
    Again, it’s just a matter of redirecting the person to your timeline.
  •   When you have a planned one hour meeting with someone and the hour is almost up but the other person shows no intention of leaving or ending the conversation, most people would let the meeting run over, which then disrupts their entire day’s schedule.
    A better approach is, “Our time is just about up. Why don’t we use the remaining few minutes to decide when we’ll meet again to complete this discussion.”
    At that point the person may suddenly be able to sum up all the key points. And if additional time is needed, now you’re doing it according to your schedule.

Take Back Your Time

Being Direct with Respect® is a skill that enables you to stop interruptions at work and home in order to do the necessary tasks.
It is an art to tell others that you can’t take care of their needs without sounding like a selfish person.
When you’re direct with respect, you can do what you need and want to do and get the respect from others at the same time.

Check out our new Communicate with Impact: Be Direct with Respect ON DEMAND Course.

Click here to Discover how WE can work together to help YOU become a master communicator so that you can add 26 days to your year!

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We want to hear from you!
Please send me your questions or comments in the comment box below… it’s all about connecting with my clients and loyal readers. 🙂
Feel free to share this article with others…just be sure to give credit to Joyce Weiss, Conflict Resolution Consultant (www.JoyceWeiss.com).

Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss
and remember…YOU GET WHAT YOU TOLERATE!

 

 

 

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Do You Want to Hear a Podcast With Tips on How to Reduce Stress and Conflict in the Workplace?

My loyal readers have asked me to inform them when I’m interviewed on the radio especially on
the topic of reducing stress and conflict in the workplace.

I was honored to be a guest on the Catalyst Business Talk Radio Show.
I thank David Pace from  Business Speakers Bureau for the introduction.

Do you want to hear my latest podcast on how to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace?
If you answered, “yes”, you’re at the right place.

Check out the entertaining and informative interview that Catalyst Business Talk Radio Show Public Radio produced on
Secrets to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace.

      Click here for the podcast
Click Here  For more great business podcasts from Catalyst Business Talk Radio Show

Was this helpful?
Let us hear your thoughts after you listen to the interview.
Feel free to share this blog with others – just give Joyce credit when you share or publish.

Sign up at the RSS feed on the blog site to be included in future blog posts from Joyce on this subject.

Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss
and Remember…You Get What You Tolerate!

PS If you haven’t signed up for the Free Video Series on “Reducing Conflict in the Workplace”… you can do this right now
Click here to register for the Free Video Series

 

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Questions to Encourage Cooperation and Respect in the Workplace

Sometimes no matter how hard you try, you just can’t get along with a certain co-worker which creates a lot of conflict in the workplace. Maybe your personalities are just too different, or perhaps your work processes and preferences conflict. Despite this fact, you still have to work together – sometimes very closely – so you need to establish a relationship of cooperation and respect.
But cooperation and respect can be hard to maintain. The key is to get the other person to agree on this one working relationship goal, and then to work together (rather than singularly) to keep the cooperation and respect strong. Therefore, meet with the co-worker who is troubling you and together answer these seven questions. Only with this insight can you move forward toward productive results.

1.    What is our main challenge?
You need to pinpoint what specifically keeps you from having a working relationship based on cooperation and respect. Does it have to do with work styles, personalities, ethnicity/cultural differences, etc.? You need to know what you have to overcome before you can actually do it.

2.    How are we different?
Suppose that you figure out that your conflicting work styles cause the friction. The next step is to identify specifically how your work styles are different. For example, maybe you discover that while you prefer to have e-mail communications, your co-worker finds e-mail cold and impersonal and wants face-to-face meetings. At this point remember not to blame each other for the difference or defend yourself. You want to find how to capitalize on your differences.

3.    How are we the same?
Despite your differences, you likely have a few similarities. In fact, at one point in your history together, you probably did one thing – even one small project – together well. What worked then? The key is for you to build off your sameness to establish cooperation and respect.

4.    What opportunities are within our reach?
In other words, if we work together what can we accomplish together? This question gets you to think positively about the other person so you can have the motivation to work together in a way that fosters cooperation and respect.

5.    How can others in the department or company help us?
Remember that you’re not alone. Others in your department or company want you to develop mutual cooperation and respect. Identify who those people are and get their input.

6.    How can we communicate with each other better?
In order to work on your relationship, try spending some time together. This does not mean hanging out together on weekends. It simply means for you to go to lunch together once per week or agree to meet for 20 minutes every Monday to go over weekly goals. Do something to get the dialog started.

7.    How can we amaze ourselves?
Determine what would be an amazing experience for the two of you working together. Describe it in great detail. Use that vision to guide your future working efforts. Before you know it, you’ll have a solid base of cooperation and respect to build from.

Was this helpful?
Let us hear your thoughts in the comment section below.

Feel free to share these tips with your team – Just be sure to give Joyce credit when you share or publish.

Sign up at the RSS feed on the blog site to be included in future blog posts from Joyce on this subject.

Until next time…Remember, You Get What You Tolerate!
Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Conflict Resolution Consultant and Accountability Coach

P.S.  Sign up for your own FREE video series – “20 Tips to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace”  HERE

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The Key to Reducing Conflict in the Workplace Intro

Thank you for signing up for my video series, The Key to Reducing Conflict in the Workplace.

Check your email inbox now for a confirmation message from Joyce Weiss.
Click the confirmation link!
(Be sure to add Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com to your address book)

You will receive access to a series of 20 short videos that reveal 20 secrets to decrease stress and reduce conflict in your workplace. It will help you:

  • Gain control in tough conversations
  • Build respect between generations
  • Resolve issues with bullies and difficult people

While you wait for your emails to show up with your videos, there are other ways you can connect with Joyce:

Joyce Weiss Social Media

I hope that these tips will help your company continuously grow and improve. My next article will give you tips on using Be Direct with Respect®.

Until next time, this is Joyce Weiss and remember, “You get what you tolerate!”

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#20 Resources to Use to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace

As a conflict resolution consultant and accountability coach I help my clients reduce conflict in the workplace to improve their working condition.

You may be wondering what the most important tip is to reduce conflict in the workplace. We covered so many ideas in this series and all of them are tools to help you during tough conversations.

The one tool that is the king or queen of all tools is Be Direct with Respect®. It is a learned skill, a willingness to risk rejection by communicating directly yet gently. It deepens relationships and resolves issues. If you integrate the “power talk formula” into your responses, it may make difficult communication a bit easier for you.

Here is a story to help you see how this tool can help you.

Sue, a client of mine was traveling to Europe for a business trip with one of her colleagues, Mike.  Even though Sue was very excited about the trip, she was apprehensive because Mike was a very negative person. They arrived in London and were standing in line to present their passport.  Sure enough Mike started complaining about the long line and he was starting to make a scene.  Sue knew that she needed to do something yet she did not want to make Mike upset.

All of a sudden she remembered the power talk formula that she learned from a coaching session with me. She took a deep breath and said, “Mike, I agree with you that it is ridiculous that this line is so long. It is hard for all of us to travel and we are all tired. I feel frustrated when I hear all of this complaining because the complaining is bringing me down.  Let’s spend this time to find out ways on how we can help our customers when they have bottlenecks in our company.”

Mike did not get defensive because Sue did not blame Mike…she made an honest comment… with good intent.  They discussed ideas on how to help their customers and this deepened their relationship.

The next time you are in a situation like this think about verbal aikido and do your best not to push back but pull back…just like Sue did when she agreed with Mike about the long line. Remember the I am…when…because formula which will help you express yourself without making the other person feel defensive.

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Thanks for spending your time with me reading all of these articles. I hope that they will help you reduce conflict in your workplace.

If you want to go further and continue the momentum please check out the Be Direct with Respect®: Communicate with Impact E Course at Joyceweiss.com.

You will receive the following benefits after taking the course:

  • Express yourself in a concise and respectful manner to become stronger at being direct and truthful
  • Build mutually beneficial relationships with co workers and family members
  • Reclaim productive time by transforming energy draining negativity and workplace bullies into positive energy
  • Problem solve real situations and reduce conflict in the workplace

Isn’t it time to get the respect that you deserve?

For those of you who want to continue your professional development please call me at 800.713.1926 to find out about my 3 month telephone coaching program.  This is for those of you who want to see dramatic communication improvement.  You will get more control in your day and experience less stress. Or you can buy it now:

Be Direct with Respect®: Communicate with Impact E Course

Until next time, this is Joyce Weiss and remember, “You get what you tolerate!”

Learn more about this topic here:

Accountability Coaching Defined

More from Joyce Weiss:

If you enjoyed this video series, you may enjoy checking out Joyce’s resources for your continuous professional development:

Communicate with Impact:
When you follow the steps in my “Communication with Impact” e-course you will transform your relationships at work and at home!
Complementary Discovery Conversation:
Think your company is different? Want to take your team to the next level of success?
Schedule a Complementary Discovery Conversation with Joyce Weiss and discover what’s possible for your work group.
Full Speed Ahead:
When you read my book, Full Speed Ahead:  Become Driven by Change you’ll discover how to achieve your personal and professional best.
Take The Ride of Your Life by Joyce Weiss Take The Ride of Your Life:
Get the book, Take the Ride of Your Life, by Joyce Weiss and discover how you can take more control in your life.

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831