Joyce Weiss

October 26, 2021 By Joyce Weiss

Surprisingly Easy Ways to Deal with Chronic Complainers | Part 2

Hello Dear Blog Readers!

Welcome to Part 2 of this blog series: Surprisingly Easy Ways to Deal with Chronic Complainers.

We covered 2 stories about chronic complainers in Part 1. They included 2 people who complained about packing for a trip and cleaning their house after construction workers left a mess.
Additionally, I also shared tips on how to deal with these chronic complainers.

Read Part 1 to discover or recap the stories and tips.

This week you will find more ideas on how to deal with these chronic complainers. There are several studies that show employees leave jobs because of these toxic workers. Additionally, they are tired of listening to their whining.

I coach others on how to stop this wasted productivity. Listening to chronic complainers takes up too much time.

Strategy #1 On How to Deal with Chronic Complainers

These toxic people complain about work, relationships, family, the long commute, the rainy weather, age, and drum rolls – politics!
We feel drained after we listen and listen.
They have legitimate complaints at times.
The problem is that most of their toxic words can become contagious and look out for morale going south.
It’s ok to validate their comment at first.
Say something like, “I can see why you are so upset.”
This works with others who are not chronic complainers. Additionally, all they want to do is have someone hear about their complaint.

Validation can make things worse with chronic complainers. And you can fall into the trap and the whining can go on

Strategy # 2 On How to Deal with Chronic Complainers

Ask them if they would like to hear your thoughts about the complaint.
You may be lucky and create a case scenario that shows the complainer another option.
Additionally, this may fuel the fire.
Handle this strategy carefully.
Don’t sound judgmental or critical.
I know that you know this! I just need to give you a friendly reminder so YOU don’t get pulled into the complainer’s drama.

Strategy # 3 On How to Deal with Chronic Complainers

Set a personal boundary on how long you will listen to the chronic complainer.
Exit gracefully.
Let them know that you have a meeting in 5 minutes.
Hopefully, they will get the hint.

Here are 2 questions for you:

What is the complaint that you hear at work that you are sick and tired of hearing?
How does your family drive you crazy with their chronic whining?

Please comment in the comment section.

You can send me a private email with personal issues that you want to explore.

Read Part 1 to discover or recap the stories and tips.

Let’s Stay Connected

Please share your thoughts about this week’s post. How does it resonate with you?
You can share your ideas in the comment section or send me a private email HERE.

Until Next Time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Please share this post on your social media. As a result, other growth-minded people can reduce their high drama and inner stress. We made it easy for you. You have the shareable social media links on the left. Easy Peasy!

P.P.S. I’m the Human Resource Professional’s Partner. I coach employees and managers to feel comfortable using their voice without losing their cool – so they feel heard and respected.

P.P.P.S Are you {or your direct reports} ready to explore working with me as your private coach? It’s easy and fits anyone’s budget and schedule.
Call me at 248.681.5831 or send an email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com.

Schedule your complimentary 20 – minute discovery call

April 20, 2021 By Joyce Weiss

Working with Rude People – Part 1

Do you work with rude people?
Are you ready to share your experience to reduce your stress?
Do you want to hear horror stories from my clients?

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, you are in the right place! 😉

The next few articles will be about adults who act like children not playing nice in the sandbox. I am NOT making any of them up. These are true incidents that my clients have shared with me. I have changed the business settings to protect the innocent.

Working with Rude People: Story #1

Bob and Gary are two colleagues who don’t get along. The tension got out of hand when the following happened in their workplace.

Bob realized that no matter what he said or did, Gary would do his best to ridicule Bob at meetings.

One day Bob was standing by his desk and Gary walked by him and actually stepped on Bob’s feet!

Working with Rude People: Questions to Ponder

Here Are Two Questions for You:

1. What would you do or say if you were Bob?

2. What would you do or say if you were the boss?

Please put your answers in the comment section below. I will share your ideas in a future article.

Click HERE to read my article on Cruel Words Take Root in Us

I want to hear from you!

There is so much rage these days! It would be great to start a conversation about rude people and behavior that you have seen. Please share your story in the comment sections below.
I will be sharing my own experiences also because it seems like rudeness is the new normal these days. Just saying!

Until next time,
Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Master Coach and Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. I will be doing an extra masterclass soon because there was a technical glitch last week. I take care of my loyal clients and readers! A few of you couldn’t get into the zoom room because of this technical issue. 🙁 I’ve got you covered! Let me know if you want to be invited to join the next FREE master class: How to Feel Heard when No One is Listening without Losing Your Cool. I will send you the registration link when I hear from you.

November 19, 2019 By Joyce Weiss

Video #5: The GAP and Triggers to Protect Yourself From Bullies in the Workplace

#bulliesintheworkplace #bullies #coach #coachingworks #bullyingprevention #bullyvideo

Do you know how to control yourself when bullies in the workplace push your hot buttons?

Welcome to the series Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace. This video gives you 2 strategies on how to protect yourself from bullies.

If you missed any of the previous videos, please click the links below:

Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1: Facts about Bullies in the Workplace
Video #2: Are you a Target for a Bully
Video #3: Why Bullying Happens
Video #4: Does Your Organization Handle Bullies?

Bullies in the Workplace Strategy #1: Use the GAP

The GAP helps us make a choice on how we react
It’s a space that we give ourselves to think about our response before we open our mouth
Get into the GAP instead of automatically responding
Recognize when you are angry and get into the GAP
Separate yourself from the criticism
Don’t take it personally

Bullies in the Workplace Strategy #2: Know your Triggers

Be aware of who sets you off
People do irritating things because that’s who they are – not because of who we are
Prepare yourself before you see your trigger who drives you crazy
Remind yourself that you don’t have to push back
You can decide how to react

More Thoughts from Joyce

The GAP and knowing your TRIGGERS are 2 powerful strategies that get me through many professional and personal gatherings.
There are certain people who drive me crazy. I am human! 🙂 I know who these people are and prepare myself to leave the conversation earlier than I did before and take a deep breath to remind myself that I don’t need to get sucked into their negativity. Clients thank me for these 2 ideas since they work!

Please contact me at 800.713.1926 to explore options for working with me as your private coach. Find your voice with Joyce is one of our new taglines.

Discover blind spots and how your communication impacts the success of your career. All sessions are conducted on the phone to fit your schedule and budget. The good news is that it usually only takes a few sessions to improve your communication skills.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you control bullies or questions on how to control your bully. What stories or expressions help you get through the stress? You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂 You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

Please visit my YouTube channel or connect with me on LinkedIn where I have posted numerous stories about having tough conversations with difficult people.

This is Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Until next time, remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

If you missed any of the previous videos in the series, please click the links below:

February 19, 2019 By Joyce Weiss

Here’s Secret #3: Earn the Respect YOU Deserve

Would you like to know a secret on how to create powerful conversations especially when you need to deliver an important message?

I’m honored to be the guest on an upcoming webinar – Powerful Communication Strategies to Get Outstanding Results. Janette Ghedotte, CEO and Founder of Accurate Body Language is the host of her TELL ME MORE Webinar Series. During the FREE webinar, you’re going to learn 4 secrets how to have these tough conversations.

Janette Ghedotte will be asking me important questions on how to kick conflict to the curb to get the respect you deserve!

You will learn 4 tested secrets to gain control and get impressive results during difficult conversations.

The 3^rd Secret is
Be Direct with Resect® –
a patent of Joyce Weiss Training & Development LLC.

It’s called the power talk formula and is easy to use after you practice the technique.
Be Direct with Respect® is a learned skill, a willingness to risk rejection by communicating directly yet gently. It deepens relationships and resolves issues.

Use the following formula
I am –your emotional response
When – non – judgmental
Because – how it affects you

Here’s a real case scenario from a client of mine:

I was embarrassed when I was disciplined in front of my employees because this discounted my leadership skills.

My client got her point across to her boss and gained an enormous amount of respect by being direct.

Make sure you register for our FREE webinar event:
http://go.accuratebodylanguage.com/joyce-webinar

Once you register, you will receive a replay reminder if you can’t join us at 7 pm EST on March 7^th.
We’ve got you covered.

Thanks to those who already signed up!

Please share the webinar on your social networking to your friends and colleagues.
You can win a chance of being selected to receive a 1-hour laser coaching session with me – after you register.

Stay tuned for a detailed description and more examples about this communication secret during the webinar so you can get great results in almost any conversation.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you create a respectful workplace. What stories or expressions have you or your leaders used?

You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂 You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Until our next video,

This is Joyce Weiss

I hope that you have a great week and remember You Get What You Tolerate!

See you at the webinar 😊

PS Please hit the links below for Webinar Secret #1 and Webinar Secret #2
Secret # 1
Secret #2

November 6, 2017 By Joyce Weiss

Life Coaching Strategies to Set Boundaries at Home and Work

Life coaching strategies are something that we can all use in our life – especially when it’s about setting boundaries to balance our hectic life.

Do you have colleagues or loved ones that use a lot of your time talking and talking while you are in the middle of something important? If so, this article will give you some ideas on how to take charge of this stressful situation.

Do you have a tough time saying, “no” to others who ask you to volunteer since you are the “right person” to help them with a project? If so, you will find out how easy it is to say, “no” without sounding aggressive.

Enjoy the life coaching strategies article and please let me know your boundary issues at work and home. I will ask you to share these with me at the end of the article.

Life Coaching Strategies #1: Learn the Power of Boundaries

You’re invited to be on the PTA! You’re such a great baker; “We need your help with the bake sale!”
A co-worker needs your help with a work project! You have no time and you don’t want to disappoint people who have such high regard for you.

It feels good when people ask us to do things we’re good at. Our egos are stroked. We like it when other people can count on us. We also need to stop ourselves when people ask us to help them when our lives are out of whack! Stop and remind yourself that it’s ok to take care of you or your family and not save the world 24 hours a day.

Life Coaching Strategies #2: Remember Boundaries from Your Past

We had boundaries as kids such as – “Come home when the streetlights come on. No TV until your homework is completed.”

Too often, though, we don’t set them for ourselves as adults.

Think about recent commitments and make a list of duties you wish you had said, “no” to. This can help you prepare a response for the next time. Firmly enforce your boundaries. If you set boundaries and people still take advantage, it’s your fault for not taking care of your own time restrictions.

Remember, “You get what you tolerate.”

Life Coaching Strategies #3: The Power of Family Boundaries

Shannon, a busy working mother, wanted to return to school to earn her degree. She knew the extra hours would affect her family, so she called a family meeting. She explained it was a two-year commitment. Her kids would need to make their own lunches and life might be a little more stressful for a while.

The payoff was a better job for Shannon, allowing the family to have money for the vacation they wanted, or for her kids to attend college. They agreed to her plan. To this day, when they complain, she reminds them about the family meeting. This worked out for Shannon because she was focused and spoke about short-term stresses for her and the family.

Life Coaching Strategies #4: The Power of Work Boundaries

Do you have a co-worker who stops by your desk, seeking help for her or his projects and leaving you with less time for your own? Use ‘I’ language to deflect them. For example, “I’m frustrated because I’d love to help you out. I have a deadline on this project.” Or set a time limit: “I can give you five minutes because I need to leave at 3:00 for my daughter’s soccer game.”

Life Coaching Strategies #5: Friendship Boundaries

What about that friend whose number on your caller ID makes you groan? These energy vampires are talkaholics, and it’s all about them and what they need. You don’t have to pick up the phone. Or you can say up front, “I’m tied up this week; I’ll be glad to call you back or email you.”

Let’s Get Real

We encounter demands for our time and energy from many directions. When those demands become too much, the continual stress can lead to an array of health problems. Create and enforce boundaries to help manage your stress levels, and you will feel better about the commitments you make.

It can mean a longer, healthier, happier life.

I want to hear from you

Send me what boundaries you set for yourself at home or work. What boundary issues do you need to control? You know I answer all comments and questions.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and quality of life.

Until next time,
Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

PS Learn how I can leverage my 30+ years of communication and coaching experience to help you or your organization address life coaching strategies here.

Read more articles and listen to podcasts at our Life Coaching Strategies Knowledge Base

Surprisingly Easy Ways to Deal with Chronic Complainers | Part 2

Strategy #1 On How to Deal with Chronic Complainers

Strategy # 2 On How to Deal with Chronic Complainers