Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Communication Strategist and Master Coach

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Yes We Can Change FEAR Into Action!

Fear into action

 

Hello,  DEAR Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update Readers!

I just thought about the power of this quote on changing fear into action.  I use this quote when clients want to improve their communication skills and relationships both at work and home.

Most of us don’t have the skills on how to successfully have that tough conversation.  It’s always a risk! Always! There is no guarantee that it will go well.
I always say that it’s worth the risk.  Our confidence level improves the more success we have with those difficult people or conversations.

It’s all about changing our mindset.  Not easy to do – and so necessary to change fear into action. We all need coaches or a support system to help us when we are stuck. Future blog posts will cover the 5 strategies in my Weiss Communication Success Plan – a significant cornerstone of our virtual course; Kick Conflict to the Curb.

If you want more information on the powerful communication strategies, all you have to do is search for past articles on the following related topics:

  • Conflict Resolution
  • The GAP-Your Safe Place
  • Making Conversations Safe
  • Triggers
  • Be Direct with Respect
  • Verbal Aikido

Let’s Stay Connected!

  • When have you changed fear into action?
  • Was it easy or hard for you?
  • How did this experience change you in a positive way?

I’ve shared my story about changing my fear of deep water into action by taking snorkeling lessons in a pool – Hey small steps, folks. 🙂 The action is that I took a trip to Bora Bora and you couldn’t get me out of the South Pacific because I loved the experience.  If I could overcome this lifelong fear, you can too.

What are some of your fears that you would like to overcome? Those of you who share either in the comment section below or send me an email will receive a new video (that I have not posted yet) about using props to engage your virtual meetings. It’s short and contains tips to liven up your virtual meetings.

Hey, Dear Readers, I’m here for you when you have questions about your own communication or relationship “challenges.” Feel free to send me an email. Full disclosure here: I don’t charge anything when people send me questions or comments via email. Staying connected is what it’s all about for me.

Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Master Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Career Advancement is like riding a bike: Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!

P.P.S. Check out more motivational quotes in the search section for more inspiration.

 

 

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A Fascinating Study on the Power of Negativity in the Workplace

Gale Research conducted a study on the Power of Negativity in the Workplace.The survey only consists of two questions.

Would you rather:
1.  Accept a $10,000 pay raise knowing that you would be working with a negative person?
2. Keep your current salary and not work with a negative person?

The video below will give you the results.

Results from the survey: The Power of Negativity in the Workplace

25% of those surveyed would accept the $10,000 pay increase knowing that they would be working with a negative person.
74% of those surveyed would stay at their current salary and work with a negative person.

Were you surprised? Clients share how much stress they experience at work because of only one complainer on their team.  It takes a few sessions to create an action plan on how to deal with the complainer. At times we can try several strategies and nothing seems to work. That’s when we have to ask ourselves what else we need to do. The answer is usually changing our mindset. Not easy. But necessary.

I’ve included a link at the end of this post to an article on THE GAP – a safe place to go before you open your mouth. This is a great strategy to use when you need to remind yourself that the negative person is not attacking you, they are negative because of their situation. At times we personalize things a bit too much – not a judgment, just being real here. 🙂

Step into the GAP and remind yourself that you can do the following;

  • Walk away
  • Say something safe
  • Speak your truth

How Can We Use the Study of The Power of Negativity to Our Advantage? 

I’m hearing about so much stress and drama going on these days at work. We need to discover why great employees are leaving your company. They may not tell you that they found another job because of a negative colleague or leader at your company. Most people keep their reasons internally because they don’t want to open up a can of worms.

Think about the cost of retraining someone new and the loss of experience. One of the best ways to reduce negativity in the workplace is to make sure that everyone feels heard. Ask more questions, including all levels of your workforce in key decisions. Speaking to your negative person is something that leaders need to do in order to reduce the toxic environment from appearing. They need to be made aware that negativity, gossip, silence, or bullying are not acceptable in your workplace.

Let’s Stay Connected

Please share your thoughts on the negativity survey and content of this article. Tell us about your experience working with a negative person and how you did or did not resolve the situation.
Send me a private email HERE if you have a question about your own stress at work or even at home. I will answer your email immediately. Let’s get the conversation started. 🙂

I added an article below if you want to read more about THE GAP – how to get into a safe place before you open your mouth.

Here’s an article about THE GAP. Enjoy and let me know what “speaks’ to you.

Until Next Time,
Have a great week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Remember to grab your personalized FREE Communication Assessment to see how your communication impacts your success at work.
Visit Kick Conflict to the Curb to get started. 

 

 

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Find out Why Respect is So Important to Me. Are You Finally Ready to Get the Respect YOU Deserve?

As a Master Coach I hear the struggles of clients who experience bullies, poor performance, gossip, clicks, low morale, direct reports with no people skills, miscommunications, can I stop now? 🙂

After taking 4 courses on how to create and present engaging online programs, I decided to create a new online class that is rocking my clients. The video will give you information about our online course: Kick Conflict to the Curb that starts September 15th. The beginning of the video shares a “lesson” on verbal aikido – a strategic communication tool to help you gain control when others push you.

Take out the popcorn and enjoy it. Make sure and check out my story below on why getting respect is so important to me. You’ll get an inside look about your Master Coach.

Here’s my story on why respect is important to me.

A TV host found me online through my trademark, “Be Direct with Respect®.” He asked me to appear on his show, sharing why respect is so important to me. For once, I, the communication strategist, couldn’t think of a thing to say. Suddenly, I remembered a turning point I’d buried years before.

At 21, fresh out of college and a brand new teacher, I moved out on my own. While my parents had imbued me with a belief in hard work and persistence, I was still a free spirit with my self-esteem intact. Or so I thought. Then I met Jerry.

After a one-year courtship, we married. Then we argued—just like any couple. The problem was that Jerry is a talented attorney. Each time we disagreed, I felt like we were in court. Since I had no training in argumentation, I was no match. My outlook had always been positive and focused on fairness, but that situation was neither positive nor fair. I didn’t have a clue how to stand up for myself. After several months, all my energy was gone and I felt invisible and voiceless —as if I’d been zapped by the Dementors from Harry Potter. I didn’t want to leave him but I couldn’t continue as we were.

Instead, I became a woman on a mission. Assertiveness was my Holy Grail. Somehow, I would make my husband behave. However, reading The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner really opened my eyes. Dr. Lerner points out that when one person in a relationship changes the steps of a dance, the other follows. It became so clear! All that time, I had been trying to fix Jerry, and nothing had ever changed except my frustration level. Now I realized I had to alter the steps of the dance. It was me who needed to change. I’d have to take a risk and have a tough conversation the next time we disagreed.

The argument that broke this passive pattern involved my decision to go back to school and pursue a career in counseling and coaching. I was thrilled, and of course, I thought Jerry would be as delighted as I was. I couldn’t wait to share my new ideas with Mr. Lawyer. Imagine my shock when Jerry told me that it would be a waste of time. He wanted me to go into sales since he knew how focused and hardworking I was.

At that moment, the old Joyce disappeared. I kept calm, drew in a breath, and took a huge risk. “I am frustrated when I share my excitement about becoming a counselor because my ideas are discounted.” I had done it—I’d changed the dance steps! Jerry was surprised by my direct statement but realized I respected him and was not sarcastic. Most importantly, I’d respected myself by standing up for what was important to me.

That one conversation changed our entire relationship. It took many more books and months of coaching for both of us to change our steps, but it worked. We are still happily married. Of course, we still disagree, but now we interact as equals and there is no winning or losing. When people ask why I specialize in conflict management, I tell them that I married a lawyer. They laugh and think that I’m joking. You know the rest of my story.

What did you think of my story about respect? Can you relate?

I’d love to hear from you. Why is respect important to you? What’s your story?
Please send me a private email if you have a question about your conflict challenges. I will get back to you because connecting with my clients is #1 plus its so much fun to get to know each other better. You can always call my cell; 248.310.6998.

There’s more! Click HERE for our Kick Conflict to the Curb landing page which describes the new online course in detail. Feel free to contact me to see if the class is right for you or your team.
I’d love to save you a seat!

Have a GREAT week,
Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Queen of Conflict Resolution

 

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Are You Ready to Join Me in an Exciting New Online Virtual Class?

My clients have been asking me to create a new online course to help them or their direct reports advance their communication skills.  They share their frustration about colleagues or employees who are bullies, negative, hot-headed, or rude. Some clients want to be taken more seriously and get noticed and want to become a stronger communicator.

They also asked me to make the course easy, affordable, results-oriented, and have time with me as their online coach.  The last couple of months have been very productive because I took a few courses on how to engage and train successful virtual experiences.  All the years as a workshop trainer and keynote speaker are being put to use along with these new and exciting strategies to create online experiences for clients.  I’m ready to help anyone who wants to join me on this powerful journey.

I started a BETA class to cover these issues a few weeks ago.  It was such a success that led me to go the next step and create Kick Conflict to the Curb:  Get the Respect YOU Deserve.  The new class will be starting the week of June 8.  It is 6-weeks long and clients will be working with me and the other communication rock stars to practice new strategies and discuss their communication or conflict issues that they want to resolve.  It’s all about improving relationships at work and home while feeling more peaceful and reduce all the drama!

Please reach out to me to find out if this class is right for you or anyone who could benefit from becoming a master communicator.  I would love to see you as a Founding Member because the investment will never be this low after this first class.  Call 248.310.6998 (cell) or 800.713.1926 (office) to get you started.  The video will give you more details.

We can even set up a private class with your employees to fit their specific schedules.

Thanks for reading and watching the video.  I’m here to answer all your questions to get you started- less tension and stress!

Have a great week,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

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Bully Video #2: Are You a Target for a Bully in the Workplace?

Have you been a target of a bully in the workplace?
What did you do to resolve this situation?
Do you want to see how dangerous bullies are to your workplace?

People can’t walk over you unless you lie down.
Ann Landers, American Advice Columnist

Welcome to our new video series – Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace. 
Please watch the links below if you missed the intro and video #1 – Facts about Bullies in the Workplace.
Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1:  Facts about Bullies in the Workplace

 

Who gets targeted by bullies in the workplace?

  • You are targeted because you pose a threat to him or her.
  • This is in the mind of the bully.
  • Targets are more technically skilled than the bully.
  • Bullies stalk targets who are better liked and have better social skills than the bully.
  • The bully’s target has a sense of integrity and is respected at work.

More thoughts from Joyce about bullies in the workplace

The challenge for my coaching clients is to see that they can have control with bullies in the workplace.  They feel like victims at times.  There are no victims without volunteers.  Once clients see the importance of breaking patterns, they start to see hope and are open to practicing the communication strategies during our sessions.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter
Martin Luther King Jr.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you’ve dealt with a bully in the workplace.  What strategy worked?  What ideas are speaking to you from the video series?  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

Learn how I can leverage my 30+ years of leadership consulting and coaching experience to help you and your organization reduce conflict with bullies in the workplace here.

This is Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

Have a great week.

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

PS Please watch the links below if you missed the intro and video #1 – Facts about Bullies in the Workplace.
Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1:  Facts about Bullies in the Workplace

 

Contact Joyce

Joyce Weiss
6737 Oyster Cove
West Bloomfield, MI 48323

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 1-248-681-5831

Let’s Connect