Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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Do You Know Bullies at Work or Home?

This post will identify types of bullies who exist.  As you watch the video start to think if you may have a bullying issue at work. 

Types of Bullies

  • The Screaming Mimi or Verbal Bully: 
    He or she screams or throws things.  Words hurt and the bully humiliates the target.
  • The Constant Critic:
    He or she tells everyone how incompetent the target is at work…usually behind the target’s back.  This can lead to career destruction for the target if leaders don’t know how to control the situation.
  • The 2 Headed Snake Bully: 
    Destroys the target with rumors.
  • The Gatekeeper Bully:
    Withholds resources necessary for targets to succeed.
  • The Sadistic or Narcissist Bully
    Lacks empathy towards others.
  • The Physical Bully:
    Actually hits the target or tables in a violent way.
  • The Serial Bully:
    He or she seems charming while the target is looked upon as a pathetic victim.
  • The Group Bully: 
    He or she likes being part of the gang of “mean boys and girls” like in high school.

 Do Any of These Bullies Sound Familiar?

 I want to hear from you!
CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered.

Do You Want to See How Your Communication Impacts Your Success at Work?
CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact Quiz.  You will get your results immediately and learn more about setting boundaries to be more effective at work and in your life.  Sound good?
Here’s the LINK

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?
Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, Communication Strategist,  and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

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Are YOU A Target for A Bully?

mean little boyI’m creating a new workshop on 2 difficult people who are creating a lot of stress for my clients.  Think for a moment who these may be.  If you guessed Bullies and Narcissists you’re correct.  The next few blogs will contain new information about these 2 personality disorders with “possible” strategies on how to deal with them.  I said possible because at times there are NO solutions if the bully or narcissist is high on the personality disorder charts.

I started thinking about my own life and if I was ever a target.  I was surprised when I realized that I was a target not too long ago.  I didn’t even realize this until I started doing research for my clients.  Stay tuned because I will share my story to start you thinking IF you have also been a target. 

Facts About Bullies

Bullies don’t have to throw a single punch to do lasting damage to another person’s health…or your business’s fiscal health.

  • Bullying is experienced by more than 1/3 of the US workforce
  • Bullying is 4 times more prevalent than illegal harassment

The majority (68%) of bullying is same gender harassment
 

What is it? Bullying is VIOLENCE

  • Verbal abuse, intimidation, humiliation
  • Sabotage over a significant amount of time
  • Could be bosses, coworkers, friends, relatives, or clients
  • Mistreatment is severe enough to compromise a worker’s health
  • Interpersonal destruction

It’s All about the Bully’s personal agenda


Kinds of Bullies

  • The screaming or verbal bully: screams or throws things:
          words hurt & they humiliate the target
  • The constant critic: Bullies say how incompetent the target is which can cause career destruction
  • The 2 headed snake: destroys by spreading rumors with work teams
  • The gatekeeper: controls by withholding resources necessary for targets to succeed
  • The sadistic or narcissistic bully: lacks empathy towards others
  • The physical bully: action oriented
  • The serial bully: bully seems charming while the target is looked upon as a whiny victim
  • Gang bullies: enjoy being part of the gang

     

     AM I Being Bullied?

  • You are miserable
  • Your work is sabotaged
  • You’re caught off guard and think about the ramifications later on
  • Lack of scars make others think you (the target) is exaggerating

     


    Why me?

  • The best and brightest are targeted
  • You pose a threat somehow to someone who is not developed as a moral human being

     
    Who Gets targeted?

  • Unlike schoolyard bullying, you were not targeted because you were a “loner” without friends to stand up to the bullying gang
  • You’re not a weakling
  • You were targeted because you posed a threat to him or her
  • This is in the mind of the bully
  • Targets are more technically skilled than the bully
  • Targets are better liked and have better social skills
  • Targets have a sense of integrity

Stay tuned for the next blog which will explore why employers make Bullying worse and what the best and brightest companies are doing to put a stop to this epidemic.


 I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me when you were targeted by a bully.  Did you resolve the situation or not? 


Do You Want to See How Your Communication Impacts Your Success at Work?
CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact Quiz. You will get your results immediately and learn more about setting boundaries with bullies and to be more effective at work and in your life. Sound good?
Here’s the LINK


Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.


Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

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Face YOUR Fears When Giving Feedback

Below is the interview that I recently took with Dr. Marie Waung, Associate Professor at University of Michigan-Dearborn. She offers many great ideas from her research.  I hope that she will be a guest another time for you to learn from her valuable information. … [Continue reading]

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How Effective Are You At Setting Boundaries At Work?

This week’s question…conflict man holding out hand..stop
How do I avoid time-wasting interruptions from others? This is a question that comes up frequently in my programs.  People often ask me, “Joyce how do I set boundaries so I can stop interruptions and do the work that I want and need to do?”

Many of my clients have difficulty setting limits with others and speaking up for themselves.  Their time is not their own because they are continually being interrupted.  They may have a difficult time saying “NO” to the request or demands of others.

We waste a lot of time when we don’t set boundaries when they interrupt us. 

 International Communications Research (ICR) in New York surveyed over 1000 people on how many minutes per day they are interrupted with things they don’t want to do. This did not include time spent on line or E-Mail. Over 42% of those surveyed said they spend 100 minutes or more every day on interruptions. This comes out to the following:
• 100 minutes per day
• 11 2/3 hours per week
• 26 days per year
And that’s a five week vacation!

While you can’t make up for lost time, you CAN have more time to do what you WANT to do…starting today!

Here’s the SECRET to realizing this dream of having more time to do what you want. Be Direct with Respect® is a skill that will show you how to stop interruptions at work in order to do your priority tasks. It is the art of telling others that you can’t take care of their needs without sounding like a selfish person. It allows you to do what you need and WANT to do and gain respect from others at the same time.

To some, “Can I have five minutes of your time?” really means, “Can I steal more than five minutes of your time?” Energy vampires who ask this question can suck the lifeblood out of you! They are people who interrupt you and complain constantly. Be Direct with Respect® is about those moments which are stolen from you. Stolen moments are when you want to take care of specific tasks and one person or another interrupts you and won’t let you get back to your priorities.

Here is one thing to keep in mind to take back control

CLICK HERE to watch my short video on the Power Talk Formula. 

So, how about you? 

Where would you like to improve your ability to stay in control of your time?
How well are you able to execute the one skill that you have to manage your time effectively with others?

How do you manage interruptions at work?  What would be possible if you tolerated fewer interruptions at work?

I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered.

Take my simple quiz and get a snapshot of your strengths and opportunities of improvement. 

CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact  Quiz.  You will get your results immediately and learn more about setting boundaries to be more effective at work and in your life. Sound good? Here’s the LINK.

Interested in more resources to take charge of your work experience? 
Check out my Communicate with Impact Master E-Course.  It’s a great way to learn the Power Talk Formula very fast without having to go anywhere.  You can learn at your own pace from anywhere.

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact  Quiz.  You will get your results immediately. You will discover how your communication is impacting your success at work.  Sound good? Here’s the LINK.

 CLICK HERE to find out how you can start setting boundaries immediately!

By 2 Comments

When You Work With a Jerk Story #4

 

conflict frustrated lady putting paper to her headHave you ever worked in an environment that seemed more like high school…with bullies, rolling eyes, gossip mongers, and mean kids? I help my clients turn their toxic environment around and help them feel comfortable during tough conversations.  This post describes an email that I received from one of my loyal readers after he read several of the past posts on working with a jerk.  I did not make this up!  Names were changed to protect the innocent. 🙂

Todd’s Story
Todd is a sales rep for a mid sized firm.  He received a promotion for selling the most products in the company for the first quarter.  The leaders wrote Todd’s name on a huge recognition board in the lunch room.  Can you guess what happened next?  If you guessed that someone erased Todd’s name from the board…you are correct!  The horrific part is that no one at Todd’s firm addressed this mean spirited act. 

What Would You Do if You Were Todd’s Boss?
Click HERE to send me your ideas on what you would do.  By now, you can probably predict what I would suggest.  The leaders need to call an all employee meeting to address the negative behavior.  This cannot be tolerated because the culture needs to be positive and the team needs to support each other.  I hear many horror stories on negativity that is allowed in the workplace.  Leaders don’t always know how to break this cycle.  A negative culture needs to be addressed with either training on communication or conflict. 

I Want to Hear From You!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own communication “issues.”

Want to Share or Use This Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article.  Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831