Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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What Happens When YOU Give Constructive Feedback?

Copy (2) of photos from juicer 029This Week’s Question…
Are you usually satisfied with the response from others when you give constructive feedback?
This a challenge for many people…especially if they “think” the feedback was done well. 

Indications to See if The Feedback Was Successful…Or Not
The real test:  What responses did you receive after the feedback?  Look for actions after you give the feedback. 

  • Do you see positive changes in the person’s behavior or tasks?
  • Has your relationship improved?
  • Does the person have a new negative attitude towards you?

Joyce, What Can I do if the Person Didn’t React Well?
I would have an open and REAL conversation about this.  For example:  “Seth, I don’t want to create any stress between us.  I do want to continue growing our professional relationship.  I was caught off guard when I heard  sarcastic remarks because the constructive feedback was meant to help your career growth…not to be mean.  Please let me know how we can move forward because I see a lot of potential having you grow within our company.”  These comments may be too forward or not forward enough for you.  We ALL communicate in a different style.  My main goal when I work with others is to improve communication.  We need to take risks in order to create change.  Remember, “You Get What You Tolerate!”

So How About You?
What would you say to someone who didn’t react well to your constructive feedback?  Where do you need to improve your communication skills?  What questions do you have for me on this subject?

I Want to Hear From You
CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Do You Want to See How Your Communication Impacts Your Success at Work?
CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact Quiz.  You will get your results immediately and learn more about resolving communication challenges to be more effective at work and in your life.  Sound good? 
Here’s the LINK

Interested in More Resources to Watch Your Career Grow?
Check out my Communicate with Impact Master E-Course.  It’s a great way to learn the newest strategies very fast without having to go anywhere.  You can learn at your own pace from anywhere.

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact Quiz.  You will get your results immediately and learn more strategies to grow your career and make time to do what you want to do in your life.  Sound good?  Here’s the LINK

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How Effective Are You At Setting Boundaries At Work?

This week’s question…conflict man holding out hand..stop
How do I avoid time-wasting interruptions from others? This is a question that comes up frequently in my programs.  People often ask me, “Joyce how do I set boundaries so I can stop interruptions and do the work that I want and need to do?”

Many of my clients have difficulty setting limits with others and speaking up for themselves.  Their time is not their own because they are continually being interrupted.  They may have a difficult time saying “NO” to the request or demands of others.

We waste a lot of time when we don’t set boundaries when they interrupt us. 

 International Communications Research (ICR) in New York surveyed over 1000 people on how many minutes per day they are interrupted with things they don’t want to do. This did not include time spent on line or E-Mail. Over 42% of those surveyed said they spend 100 minutes or more every day on interruptions. This comes out to the following:
• 100 minutes per day
• 11 2/3 hours per week
• 26 days per year
And that’s a five week vacation!

While you can’t make up for lost time, you CAN have more time to do what you WANT to do…starting today!

Here’s the SECRET to realizing this dream of having more time to do what you want. Be Direct with Respect® is a skill that will show you how to stop interruptions at work in order to do your priority tasks. It is the art of telling others that you can’t take care of their needs without sounding like a selfish person. It allows you to do what you need and WANT to do and gain respect from others at the same time.

To some, “Can I have five minutes of your time?” really means, “Can I steal more than five minutes of your time?” Energy vampires who ask this question can suck the lifeblood out of you! They are people who interrupt you and complain constantly. Be Direct with Respect® is about those moments which are stolen from you. Stolen moments are when you want to take care of specific tasks and one person or another interrupts you and won’t let you get back to your priorities.

Here is one thing to keep in mind to take back control

CLICK HERE to watch my short video on the Power Talk Formula. 

So, how about you? 

Where would you like to improve your ability to stay in control of your time?
How well are you able to execute the one skill that you have to manage your time effectively with others?

How do you manage interruptions at work?  What would be possible if you tolerated fewer interruptions at work?

I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered.

Take my simple quiz and get a snapshot of your strengths and opportunities of improvement. 

CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact  Quiz.  You will get your results immediately and learn more about setting boundaries to be more effective at work and in your life. Sound good? Here’s the LINK.

Interested in more resources to take charge of your work experience? 
Check out my Communicate with Impact Master E-Course.  It’s a great way to learn the Power Talk Formula very fast without having to go anywhere.  You can learn at your own pace from anywhere.

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact  Quiz.  You will get your results immediately. You will discover how your communication is impacting your success at work.  Sound good? Here’s the LINK.

 CLICK HERE to find out how you can start setting boundaries immediately!

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Can We Really Have Tough Conversations With Our BOSS?

cartoon criticize you in publicGlad that you decided to find out the answer which is…It Depends!  Some bosses are open and welcome constructive feedback while others are so full of ego and don’t encourage an open dialogue.  I just returned from presenting several workshops at the US Chamber Institute in Madison WI.  It was a real privilege speaking with men and women who work in chambers or associations throughout the USA.  

One of the sessions I conducted was “Managing Upward.”  I posed the following question to them…”What are some or your challenges with your boss or upper management?” 

Here are some of their responses:

  • The boss not being available
  • There is no follow up on issues that require swift action
  • Not dealing with conflict and letting things slide
  • Meetings which waste our time
  • No accountability with the team
  • Not setting expectations and no one knows what they need to be doing
  • Not having trust with my boss

Ouch!  Is that enough?  The list was a lot longer and you will find more scenarios in future posts.

What would you do if your boss gave you negative feedback in front of your team?

Would you…

  • Stay silent?
  • Say something that you wished you didn’t say?
  • Get the respect that you deserved by being direct with respect?

This is always a tough situation because it depends on so many variables when communicating to upward management.  Here is one option that we practiced in the session.

I don’t want to be disrespectful.
I do want to clear the air.
“I was caught off guard yesterday when I received negative comments in front of my colleagues because I would have appreciated the important feedback in a one to one meeting.”

Let’s dissect this formula.  I don’t want…I do want will make most communication safe.  The group came up with some realistic answers for their own situations using this one strategy. 
I am…when…because is the power talk formula that I have mentioned MANY times in my posts.  This works like a charm.  I was caught off guard is a statement that has NO judgment.  It is how you feel.  Try using this and let me know what results you receive. 

What will you say to your boss if he or she gives you negative feedback in front of others?

Discover how your communications skills impact your success at work.
Click HERE to take the quiz.

I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 PS Discover how your communication skills impact your success at work.
CLICK HERE to take the quiz.

By 2 Comments

Travel Can be Dangerous: Select Compatable Companions

This new series on “Working with Jerks” is really speaking to many of you.  I have received more private emails about readers’ nightmares concerning difficult people in their personal and professional life.  Let’s see if you can relate with this story.  I will be asking you to share your ideas on how you would have handled the situation.

George’s Travel Nightmare

George went on a trip to Arizona with an alleged good friend of his…Jim.  George came down with the flu and could not participate in the side trips.  George had a high temperature and was upset that he could not partake in the activities.  Here comes the DRAMA!  Can you guess what Jim said to George?  If you guessed that he was sensitive to George’s situation, you are wrong.  Each day Jim said, “George you missed such great experiences.    I can’t believe that you wasted your time sleeping instead of pushing yourself.”  This trip ended a good relationship.  George saw another side of Jim.  He could not continue being Jim’s friend after Jim showed such insensitivity. 

Joyce, What Do You Think?

I spoke to George a few times to make sure that I understood exactly what happened.  I asked him if Jim was just sharing his excitement about his experience and missed his friend.  George told me that Jim was been insensitive and was not concerned at all.  I do realize that there are always 3 sides of every story…George’s side, Jim’s side, and the other side!  If I interviewed Jim, I probably would have heard a totally different explanation. We don’t see how others see us.  This is usually the largest communication breakdown.  George told me that he “should have” spoken to Jim while on the trip.  I suggested that he could still have that tough conversation.  George does not want to continue the friendship. 

I recently went on a vacation with friends and we constantly teased each other about how we don’t see ourselves as others do.  Humor worked with us because we all got into the action.  No one was singled out like Jim did to George.  It’s your turn to share what you would have done in this situation.

What Would You Do If You Were George? 

Would you …  
       Stay silent and not bring this up to Jim?
       Become sarcastic and say something like,  “You are an insensitive jerk.”

Or, would you say, “I don’t want to create stress between us.  I do want to clear the air.  I was  caught off guard when  I  heard the comments about how much I missed while I had the flu.  Those comments didn’t help me one bit.  I felt bad enough that I missed all of the excitement.”

CLICK HERE to watch a short video on my blog, “Why You Have to Run Away From Negatoids.”

 I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your thoughts on what you would have done in a similar situation.  I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own communication issues and conflict in the workplace.

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 PS  Click HERE to watch a short video on my blog, “Why You Have to Run Away From Negatoids.”

By 2 Comments

When You Work With a Jerk Story #4

 

conflict frustrated lady putting paper to her headHave you ever worked in an environment that seemed more like high school…with bullies, rolling eyes, gossip mongers, and mean kids? I help my clients turn their toxic environment around and help them feel comfortable during tough conversations.  This post describes an email that I received from one of my loyal readers after he read several of the past posts on working with a jerk.  I did not make this up!  Names were changed to protect the innocent. 🙂

Todd’s Story
Todd is a sales rep for a mid sized firm.  He received a promotion for selling the most products in the company for the first quarter.  The leaders wrote Todd’s name on a huge recognition board in the lunch room.  Can you guess what happened next?  If you guessed that someone erased Todd’s name from the board…you are correct!  The horrific part is that no one at Todd’s firm addressed this mean spirited act. 

What Would You Do if You Were Todd’s Boss?
Click HERE to send me your ideas on what you would do.  By now, you can probably predict what I would suggest.  The leaders need to call an all employee meeting to address the negative behavior.  This cannot be tolerated because the culture needs to be positive and the team needs to support each other.  I hear many horror stories on negativity that is allowed in the workplace.  Leaders don’t always know how to break this cycle.  A negative culture needs to be addressed with either training on communication or conflict. 

I Want to Hear From You!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own communication “issues.”

Want to Share or Use This Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article.  Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831