Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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Life Coaching Strategies to Set Boundaries at Home and Work

Life coaching strategies are something that we can all use in our life – especially when it’s about setting boundaries to balance our hectic life.

Do you have colleagues or loved ones that use a lot of your time talking and talking while you are in the middle of something important?  If so, this article will give you some ideas on how to take charge of this stressful situation.

Do you have a tough time saying, “no” to others who ask you to volunteer since you are the “right person” to help them with a project?  If so, you will find out how easy it is to say, “no” without sounding aggressive.

Enjoy the life coaching strategies article and please let me know your boundary issues at work and home.  I will ask you to share these with me at the end of the article.

Life Coaching Strategies #1:  Learn the Power of Boundaries

You’re invited to be on the PTA!  You’re such a great baker; “We need your help with the bake sale!”
A co-worker needs your help with a work project!  You have no time and you don’t want to disappoint people who have such high regard for you.

It feels good when people ask us to do things we’re good at. Our egos are stroked. We like it when other people can count on us.  We also need to stop ourselves when people ask us to help them when our lives are out of whack!  Stop and remind yourself that it’s ok to take care of you or your family and not save the world 24 hours a day.

Life Coaching Strategies #2:  Remember Boundaries from Your Past

We had boundaries as kids such as – “Come home when the streetlights come on. No TV until your homework is completed.”

Too often, though, we don’t set them for ourselves as adults.

Think about recent commitments and make a list of duties you wish you had said, “no” to.  This can help you prepare a response for the next time.  Firmly enforce your boundaries. If you set boundaries and people still take advantage, it’s your fault for not taking care of your own time restrictions.

Remember, “You get what you tolerate.”

Life Coaching Strategies #3:  The Power of Family Boundaries

Shannon, a busy working mother, wanted to return to school to earn her degree. She knew the extra hours would life coaching strategiesaffect her family, so she called a family meeting.  She explained it was a two-year commitment.  Her kids would need to make their own lunches and life might be a little more stressful for a while.

The payoff was a better job for Shannon, allowing the family to have money for the vacation they wanted, or for her kids to attend college.  They agreed to her plan. To this day, when they complain, she reminds them about the family meeting.  This worked out for Shannon because she was focused and spoke about short-term stresses for her and the family.

Life Coaching Strategies #4:  The Power of Work Boundaries

Do you have a co-worker who stops by your desk, seeking help for her or his projects and leaving you with less time for your own?  Use ‘I’ language to deflect them.  For example, “I’m frustrated because I’d love to help you out.  I have a deadline on this project.” Or set a time limit:  “I can give you five minutes because I need to leave at 3:00 for my daughter’s soccer game.”

Life Coaching Strategies #5:  Friendship Boundaries

What about that friend whose number on your caller ID makes you Life coaching strategiesgroan?  These energy vampires are talkaholics, and it’s all about them and what they need.  You don’t have to pick up the phone. Or you can say up front, “I’m tied up this week; I’ll be glad to call you back or email you.”

Let’s Get Real

We encounter demands for our time and energy from many directions.  When those demands become too much, the continual stress can lead to an array of health problems.  Create and enforce boundaries to help manage your stress levels, and you will feel better about the commitments you make.

It can mean a longer, healthier, happier life.

 I want to hear from you

Send me what boundaries you set for yourself at home or work.  What boundary issues do you need to control?  You know I answer all comments and questions.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts.  Help us help them reduce conflict and quality of life.

Until next time,
Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

PS Learn how I can leverage my 30+ years of communication and coaching experience to help you or your organization address life coaching strategies here.

Read more articles and listen to podcasts at our Life Coaching Strategies Knowledge Base

 

 

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Life Coaching Strategies to Help Your Employees Reduce Stress

Are you a leader who wants to learn life coaching strategies?
Do you want to find answers on how to balance your life better?
Are you ready to change one small behavior to reduce stress?

If so, these 3 life coaching strategies will help you get some great results.

After working for the same software company for several years, a young professional moved 90 minutes away from the organization.  Instead of dealing with a grueling commute, she proposed that she could come into the office just one day a week, and work the rest of the time from home. The company leadership agreed.  The woman found a mutually agreeable solution that allowed her to achieve work-life balance.

Unfortunately, many employees in the same situation wouldn’t feel comfortable making such a request.  With so many companies doing more with less, employees need to achieve a better work-life balance… and you can help your organization do just that.

Life Coaching Strategies #1:  Find Out What Coworkers and Employees Need

life coaching strategies

Some workers might want a more flexible office schedule, a compressed workweek, job sharing options, or resources for child care or elder care. Others may want healthy workplace initiatives like on-site exercise classes and wellness lectures.

What can you do?

Create a work-life committee to survey people and find out their needs. Members can then recommend ways the organization might help employees achieve more balanced lives.

Life Coaching Strategies #2:  Relieving the Pressure of Overtime Demands

When demands become rigorous, everyone suffers.

What can you do?

Do something special for coworkers and employees – like providing a dessert, a dinner, or little thank you gestures. Suggest that dedicated people get an afternoon off… and everyone will be rewarded with a newly refreshed coworker.

Life Coaching Strategies #3:  Setting an Example

People who don’t take time for themselves feel more stressed, and consequently, become less productive at work.

What can you do?

Don’t begrudge people their personal time. Encourage others by modeling how important balance is in your life- when you leave at 5:00 p.m. to see your son’s soccer game, realize that you are an outstanding role model!

Concluding Thoughts about these 3 Life Coaching Strategies

Most of us are looking for ways to find more balance in our life.  I constantly look for life coaching strategies for my clients and myself! 🙂  We can lower our stress by changing only one behavior.  If you are a leader bring in speakers from a local health care facility to help your employees learn the newest strategies for lowering stress. There are many books, youtube videos, and classes on finding balance.  Cicero said, Where there is life, there is hope.

The challenge for all of us is finding a solution that fits our individual needs.  I will be sharing more articles and videos on finding balance and reducing stress because my loyal readers and clients keep on asking me to do so.

 I want to hear from you

Send me an email with your questions or comments on how you or your company use life coaching strategies to find balance. What challenges to you still experience?  What topics do you want me to cover in a future article?

Read more articles and listen to podcasts at our Life Coaching Strategies Knowledge Base

 

This is Joyce Weiss, Communications Strategist and Coach

Learn how my 30+ years of communication and leadership consulting and coaching experience can help your organization address life coaching strategies here.

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”


 

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You Have to Read This Book on New Ideas to Motivate Others

cartoon oops fb out of timeIf you want to reduce conflict in the workplace and fully engage yourself or your team then read on! Daniel Pink is the author of DRIVE: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us.

The next few blog posts will describe important aspects of autonomy that you can adapt for yourself or your team. Some of the information is not new YET Daniel Pink shares interesting strategies to explore what motivates you and others.

Autonomy is always an issue that my clients want me to cover in their training. They always ask me, how can I motivate my team or fire up the troops? 

 This post and the ones that follow will help start your own journey on this topic.

Click here for my short video on The Importance of Being Accountable.

 Daniel Pink tells us that Motivation 1 is about survival only.

Motivation 2 is about a drive to seek reward and avoid punishment such as bonuses or incentive plans.

I will describe Daniel Pink’s ideas about Motivation 3 in the next blog post.  I will give you a hint…it is all about autonomy.

 Motivation 2 sounds like…”If you do this…you will get this.” For example, “If you improve productivity we will give you a bonus.”  People expect these kinds of rewards all the time and it  takes away their autonomy.  People don’t have control of their lives with this kind of motivation.  They eventually do the task for the reward.

The carrots and sticks approach creates the following behavior:

  • Diminishes performance
  • Crushes creativity
  • Fosters short term thinking

At times the carrots and sticks approach will work.  For example, promise an office party if the team does some mundane task on a weekend. “If you come to the office on the weekend to stuff envelopes, we will have a gourmet dinner delivered to our office this week.”  There is no hidden agenda in this statement.  The team knows that for this one mundane project, they will get rewarded.

Carrots and Sticks (Motivation 2) works when:

  • You offer a rational for why the task is necessary
  • Acknowledge that the task is boring
  • Allow people to complete the task their own way

Please share the good or bad news on how you use this kind of approach.
What has worked and what has back fired when you use the “if you do this…you will get this” approach?

Look for strategies on the new way of motivating others in the next few blogs. I will share case scenarios that I have seen with my own clients on how they have turned non engaged teams into self motivated employees.

Was this helpful?

Please send me any comments that you may have for this blog post.
Place your comments in the comment box at the end of this post.

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts.
Feel free to share this post. Just make sure and give credit to:
Joyce Weiss Training & Development LLC > www.JoyceWeiss.com
Please let others know about these blog posts on reducing conflict at the workplace and home.

There may be someone in your life who is experiencing some stress… who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Conflict Resolution Consultant

I help others have tough conversations so they get a better night’s sleep.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

 

PS Click here to check out my short video on the importance of autonomy

 

 

 

 

 

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Is Stress in the Workplace Killing YOU?

I recently received this interesting message from MastersDegreeOnLine.Org who gave me permission to use their image in my blog.

My clients ask me how they can reduce stress at work and gain more control in their life.
This blog post will give you some new facts about stress that may encourage you to see how important it is to take care of YOU!!

YES…even at work.  Hey, if you don’t take care of yourself…who will?  Got you there, didn’t I? 🙂

Let me know what kind of stress you experience at work. 
I will create a new article from your comments.

Master Your Stress
Created by: www.MastersDegreeOnline.org

If you found this post interesting, click here for a blog post on New Facts About Stress

Was this helpful?
Please feel free to share this post with anyone who you think could benefit from the information.
Just be sure and give Joyce Weiss credit when you share or publish.

Sign up at the  RSS Feed on this blog site to be included in future posts from Joyce on this subject.

For more information on how to get your FREE Video Series –
20 Tips to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace sent to you and
the newly launched Communicate with Impact On Demand Course
 hit this link to Joyce’s Conflict in the Workplace Website.

Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss…and Remember

YOU GET WHAT YOU TOLERATE! 🙂

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Add 26 Days to Your Year: Reduce Conflict in the Workplace

“If only I had more hours in the day.” How many times have you uttered those words?
If you’re like most people, you either think it or say it daily.
The good news is that we all have more time accessible to us.
The bad news is that we often let others steal it from us.

Consider this: International Communications Research in New York surveyed over 1,000 people on how many minutes per day
they are interrupted with things that they don’t want to do.
Over 42 percent of those surveyed admit that they spend 100 minutes or more every day on interruptions.

This breaks down to the following:

100 minutes (1-2/3 hours) per day
11-2/3 hours per week
26 days per year
5 weeks of vacation

While you can’t make up for lost time, you can have more time to do what you want to do – starting today!
The secret is to use Be Direct with Respect® principles.

Here’s how.

  •  When someone asks, “Can I have five minutes of your time?” the natural response is to say,
    “Sure,” even though you really don’t have  five minutes…and you know those five minutes will grow into 15, 20, or even 30 minutes. A better response is, “Sure, I’d love to help you.   Let me call you when I’m done with this project and we can talk then.”
    Now you’re still engaging the person, but you’re doing it on your terms and your timeline, not theirs.
  •  When someone tries to start a friendly conversation with you or engage in small talk and you don’t have the time,
    the usual response is to stop what you’re doing and talk to the person. After all, you don’t want to be rude.
    A better response is, “I’d love to hear more about your grand kids (or your new project, the new clients, etc.),
    Right now I have a meeting (or a deadline to meet, a report to finish, a doctor’s appointment, etc.).
    So let’s talk about this later today when I’m available.”
    Again, it’s just a matter of redirecting the person to your timeline.
  •   When you have a planned one hour meeting with someone and the hour is almost up but the other person shows no intention of leaving or ending the conversation, most people would let the meeting run over, which then disrupts their entire day’s schedule.
    A better approach is, “Our time is just about up. Why don’t we use the remaining few minutes to decide when we’ll meet again to complete this discussion.”
    At that point the person may suddenly be able to sum up all the key points. And if additional time is needed, now you’re doing it according to your schedule.

Take Back Your Time

Being Direct with Respect® is a skill that enables you to stop interruptions at work and home in order to do the necessary tasks.
It is an art to tell others that you can’t take care of their needs without sounding like a selfish person.
When you’re direct with respect, you can do what you need and want to do and get the respect from others at the same time.

Check out our new Communicate with Impact: Be Direct with Respect ON DEMAND Course.

Click here to Discover how WE can work together to help YOU become a master communicator so that you can add 26 days to your year!

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We want to hear from you!
Please send me your questions or comments in the comment box below… it’s all about connecting with my clients and loyal readers. 🙂
Feel free to share this article with others…just be sure to give credit to Joyce Weiss, Conflict Resolution Consultant (www.JoyceWeiss.com).

Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss
and remember…YOU GET WHAT YOU TOLERATE!

 

 

 

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831