Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

By Leave a Comment

Video 6: Changing our Attitudes to Protect Ourselves from Bullies in the Workplace

Does your attitude affect how you deal or don’t deal with bullies in the workplace?

Welcome to video #6 in the series “Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace.”  This week’s post and video describe how our attitude affects our communication when we deal with bullies.  I know this is nothing new!  It’s all about attitude!

The better we feel about ourselves, the fewer times we have to knock someone down in order to feel tall!
Odetta, American Singer, and Actor
I would like to give bullies Odetta’s quote – wouldn’t you?

Strategy #1:  How Your Attitude Affects Your Interactions with Bullies

One of my coaching clients practiced how to make conversations safe with me before he had the tough conversation.  His bully actually listened to him after the interaction.  This bully was not aware that his words hurt others.  No one had the nerve to speak with him.  My client did and the bully now has respect for him.  Instead of saying, “Why do you like insulting our team members?”  He changed this to, “Let’s all discuss how we can communicate better with everyone on our team.”  The bully was included in the conversation and the team opened up with solid solutions and deep conversations.  A win/win was the result.

Strategy #2:  How Your Attitude Affects Your Interactions with Bullies

What can you do?

  • Stop complaining about the bully to others
  • Create a plan
  • Go to leadership
  • Practice the communication skills that you learned in the seriesYou can search for the entire series – Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace on the links below:
    LinkedIn, My YouTube Channel or This Blog:

Here’s a disclaimer!  It’s always a risk to have tough conversations.  At least you tried!  You didn’t stand still and take the constant sarcasm or criticism from this difficult person.

I want to Hear From You

Add a comment to my blog on how you deal with negative people on your team.  What stories or expressions help you?  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Stay Connected with Joyce

Click the link for more information on how I can help you and your team with bullies in the workplace,
Please contact me at 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development.
There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule! 🙂

Send me an email
I will send you an article on Wave Goodbye to Workplace Feuds.

 

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

I hope you have a great week!

 

 

By Leave a Comment

Secret # 4: Control Your Hot Buttons with Verbal Aikido

https://youtu.be/Sgv67BBX54U

Thanks to those of you who have registered for our upcoming webinar – Powerful Communication Secrets to Get Outstanding Results!  This article contains all 4 secrets to entice you to sign up if you haven’t already done so.  😉

The 4th webinar secret is verbal aikido – it’s about diplomatically dealing with difficult people – especially when they push you. The person who pulls back wins in martial arts.  It’s the same thing when we have conversations with people who TRY to make us defensive.

Here’s an example of an angry client attacking you:
The client says, “I requested the material 3 weeks ago and I still didn’t receive it.  What’s wrong with your company?”
A typical response is – “This is not my department and I have no idea what happened to your material” or “We are short staffed and are doing the best that we can.”

This person got defensive and you can only imagine how the conversation would escalate into an even more heated conversation. One way to use verbal aikido is to accept criticism.

For example:

“You’re right, it has been 3 weeks, I apologize for this and will have it in your hands today.  We have been short staff, even though this is NO excuse.  Call me in one hour if you don’t receive the information.  You can count on me.”

Make sure you register for our FREE webinar event:
http://go.accuratebodylanguage.com/joyce-webinar

Once you register, you will receive a replay link if you can’t join us 7 pm EST on March 7th .
Please share the webinar on your social networking to your friends and colleagues.  You will win a chance of being selected to receive a 1-hour laser coaching session with me – after you register.

Stay tuned for a detailed description and more examples about this communication secret during the webinar, so you can get outstanding results in almost any conversation.

I can’t wait for you to meet Janette Ghedotte, CEO and Founder of Accurate Body Language.  Joyce Weiss | Webinar
She will be asking me questions on why respect is so important to me.  We will also share several stories on how clients have become more confident and competent – after using these action-packed communication strategies.  Our hope is that you will find answers to your communication challenges – to Kick Conflict to the Curb:  Get the RESPECT you Deserve! Get ready to learn, recharge and have fun!

Below are videos on Secrets 1-3 for your enjoyment:  🙂
Secret #1:  Make Tough Conversations Safe
Secret #2:  Gain Control by Using the GAP
Secret #3:  Kick Conflict to the Curb with Be Direct with Respect®  

Until our next time,

This is Joyce Weiss

I hope that you have a great week and remember You Get What You Tolerate!

Please share this article with team members, colleagues, and friends so they can
Kick Conflict to the Curb:  Get the RESPECT They Deserve!

See you at the webinar 😊

By Leave a Comment

Communication Strategies: How to Deal with Mediocrity

Communication Strategies to use in the workplace has been the topic for the past few posts.  This week it’s all about dealing with those people who are on the edge – the low performers or slackers.

Read the first article in the series:
Communication Strategies to use with Someone who Didn’t Receive a Promotion.

Read the second article in the series:
Communication Strategies to use with People Bringing Problems to Work.

I hope that you find this article helpful with those slackers in your workplace.

Communication Strategy #1:  Make the Conversation Safe

Make the conversation safe by using I do want – I don’t want. communication strategies
Here are a few examples:

I don’t want to discount your years of service.
I do want to discuss some performance concerns.

I don’t want to discount your value.
I do want to discuss how your behavior is affecting team productivity.

This strategy will help you create a safe starting place.  You will be more direct after using the next communication strategy.

Communication Strategy #2:  Use Be Direct with Respect®

Those of you who read my blogs know this communication strategy and it’s worth repeating as a refresher.  Be direct with respect® deepens relationships and resolves issues.

I am ________________________
(Your emotional response)

When I ______________________
(Non-judgmental)

Because ______________________
(How it affects you)

I am  concerned when I see productivity issues because you were a star performer a couple months ago.

Communication Strategy #3:  Discuss What you Notice and Ask Questions

This communication strategy gives you a chance to discuss the changes that you see and how it’s impacting the team.

Here’s what I’m noticing…
This is how it’s impacting the team…
Where are you stuck?

These 3 communication strategies will give you a plan on how to talk to a mediocre person.  The next step is to discuss the ramifications if things don’t change.  Expectations need to be clear and understood.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you deal with mediocrity. What stories or expressions help you get the results that you need? You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

 

Learn how I can leverage my 30+ years of leadership consulting and coaching experience to help your organization address conflict resolution in the workplace here.

This is Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

 

Have a great week.

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

By Leave a Comment

A Powerful Communication Tool to Use with Supervisors

Do these questions resonate with you?

  • Has your supervisor discounted you in front of your team?
  • Are you tired of gossip and negativity?

If so, this article will give you a communication tool to start using immediately with your supervisor and team.  You will learn 2 strategies that I teach during professional coaching sessions and resolving conflict trainings.  It will be a great review for those of you who are familiar with these communication tools.

Communication Tool #1:
Expressing your concern to a supervisorcommunication tool

This case scenario is one that happens way too often.  Your supervisor discounts you in front of your direct reports.  Here’s a communication tool to use to voice your concern.

Make the conversation safe by using:  I don’t want – I do want.
I don’t want to be disrespectful.
I do want to communicate my concern about questioning my decisions in front of my team.

Next use the power talk formula:  I am – when – because
I am discouraged when my decisions are discounted in front of my team because it discredits my leadership.

Communication Tool #2:  Stop team negativity communication tool

This communication tool is perfect to use when you are sick of team gossip or negativity.  You can use this in front of your entire team or with an individual.

I don’t want to hear constant gossip and negativity.
I do want people to communicate directly to each other when there is an issue and NOT gossip with others.

I am concerned when I hear team gossip and negativity because the atmosphere at work is toxic.

Joyce’s Thoughts

There are no guarantees that you will get the results that you want after using these communication tools. These strategies are a great way to start the conversations. You will respect yourself for expressing yourself.  Hopefully your supervisor and team will respect you for being open in a respectful way.

Remember these two leadership ideas:

  • Leaders need to empower their team members to resolve communication issues on their own.
  • The team can meet with the leader only when the team attempts to resolve the issues on their own.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you successfully share your concerns with your supervisor. What stories or expressions help you get through these conversations? You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email HERE with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

Read my more articles about communication tools HERE.

 

This is Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

Have a great week.

Until next time, Remember…“You Get What You Tolerate!”

 

By Leave a Comment

8 Words to Change Your Conversation with Complainers

Do you have complainers in your life who suck your energy by moaning about the same things?
Do you want to learn how to control these conversations?

How I stopped being so nice with complainers

Maya Angelou – American poet said, “Being kind doesn’t mean one has to be a mat.”

Her words spoke to me years ago.  I remember a turning point when I listened to friends who continually complained about aspects of their life.  Before I attained my Masters in Counseling my friends complained and I listened.  Nothing changed.  They didn’t alter their stories and repeatedly talked about their boss, colleagues or family members.

Eight powerful words to use with complainers

complainersI learned a phrase from a professor that made all the difference in these communications.  Are you ready to hear what these words are?

What are you going to do about it?

Some complainers will stop their whining and others won’t

I started to ask them, “What are you going to do about it?”  I was sincere and did my best not to sound judgmental.

It’s interesting to recall that some of my friends stopped calling me.  They didn’t like the new Joyce.  They are probably still complaining unless someone was able to help them see that these comments kept them stuck in the land of “poor me.”

On the flip side, many of my friends appreciated the magical eight-word phrase.  They started owning their situations and coming up with plans how they could move forward.

A real conversation with a complainer

complainers; negativity in the workplace | improving communicationA friend was having a difficult time at work and kept on grumbling how unfair her boss was by asking her to do things that were not in her job description.  I said, “I’m sorry to hear that you are having a tough time at work.  I’ll be glad to help you brainstorm how to find a new job or how to speak with your boss.  I’m not willing to listen to you rehash how unfair life is for you.  That’s not helping you move forward.”

She needed to hear these words.  She was ready to stop complaining.  She decided to start looking for different job opportunities where her skills would match her job.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how you have stopped complainers from moaning all the time.  What stories or expressions do you use? You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email HERE with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts.  Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

Learn how my online coaching course – Communication Skills at Work will help you skyrocket your career.  Please check out the link HERE to watch a short video and read an article about the 1st week of the course.

This is Joyce Weiss

Corporate Communication Strategist and Career Coach

Have a great week.

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

 

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831