Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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Seasons Greetings from Joyce Weiss

Joyce Weiss

I hope that you are spending some quality time with your friends, family and yourself during this holiday season!

Thoughts from Joyce

I was speaking to my son, Ron Weiss (RonWeissAttorney.com) about life the other day.  He came up with a simple yet important idea that is a good reminder for all of Joyce Weiss | Ron Weissus.  This coming year let’s do our best to appreciate what we have in our life.  We need to stop comparing our lives to others on their success either with family or work.

Social media does not help when we see the trips, family photos, promotions, etc from our friends.  “The grass has always been greener” when we look at others.  It does not have to be this way.  The moment we start looking at our reality and not making comparisons to others is the moment that we start enjoying our life.

Family, friends, and clients are three areas in my life that I NEVER take for granted.  It takes time, compromise, tough conversations, and positive energy to create these valuable relationships.

Joyce Gets Real

I can hear some of you say, “Joyce, I know this but my relative is so down and compares his or her life to others while ignoring the positives.”
Believe me, we all have friends and relatives who are down and out at times and who need a gentle reminder (ok not always gentle) on this important subject.  We all need a push at times and that’s why inspirational books, quotes, and trainers help others find joy in their life.

I will include some of my favorite motivational quotes and posters for the next few posts that you can share with those who need to hear this message.

Ron Weiss, I thank you for your gentle reminders to your mom at times to keep me on track.  That’s what families and good friends do.  We support and help each other when we are down and out or during positive moments.

Stay Connected with Joyce

Enjoy the holiday season and remember to look at what you have in life and share these thoughts with your loved one.  This could be the best gift that you can give.

Let me know what you are grateful for this season in the comment section or feel free to send me a private email HERE.

Please contact me at 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development.
There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule! 🙂

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!

 

 

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A Communication Strategy That Really Worked with My Family

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCOH-8Z-fs8

Would you like to learn a communication strategy to use the next time you initiate a family dinner or business meeting?

Have you ever attended a family gathering or business meeting and it seemed like the stars were lined up – where everyone spoke and had a chance to share his or her thoughts?  If so, did you ever analyze why it was such a successful time for you and others?  This article is about one of those perfect family dinners.

My story starts during an evening where everyone got along and the communication flowed as if was a well-directed play.   A cousin of mine was in town visiting his mother.  He and I enjoy lunch or coffee each time he visits her.  This time he expressed an interest in getting to know my grown children and their kids.  I invited my family to come to dinner.  They all accepted the invitation because they knew that I’m a huge fan of this cousin.

Here’s the hard part of my story.  I decided to sit back and not speak as much as I usually do because this night was about the family getting to know each other.  It was not about me interjecting my own opinion about our family history.  Remember I told you that keeping silent is a tough behavior of mine!  The good news is I’m glad that I observed the magic happening right before my eyes.

The communication strategies below can help you the next time you initiate a family gathering or business meeting.

communication strategyCommunication Strategy #1:  It helps if everyone is motivated to attend

Of course, this is tough for meetings at work but, it can be done when leaders create a positive environment for everyone.  Food and a focused agenda help.  You can invite colleagues and direct reports who you feel have the right attitude to attend the meeting.

I don’t know about you, some of our family gatherings aren’t picture perfect.  The timing may not be right or family members were tired.  Well, this time everyone was eager to be there.  It worked because my cousin reached out and my kids were thrilled that he wanted to get to know them better.

Communication Strategy #2:  Leaders need to sit back at times and let the conversation flow

Leaders usually start the conversation, ask questions, and follow his or her agenda.  The magic happens when leaders don’t give their opinion but, observe and listen to others.  People are open when they want to be there and when they feel valued.  The quiet ones feel more comfortable and contribute when they see the leader relaxed and not micromanaging the meeting.

Of course, I wanted to interject a story here or there and I chose not to.  Instead, I let the family make their own conversation.  Again, this was not easy but so enjoyable to watch.

Communication StrategyCommunication Strategy #3:  Ask questions about others that show you are interested in them

This communication strategy is so basic yet is one of my secrets to success.  My grandkids always hear me express how important it is for them to ask questions to others.  Making other people feel important is something  I find missing from many communications.  I know you know what I mean.  It’s usually all about the speaker – a one-sided conversation.

Back to my story:  Each person asked questions about the other person during the entire dinner.  The result was that everyone felt appreciated. The laughter and positive atmosphere were apparent and I was smiling internally during the entire evening.

Now for some reality

The communication strategy is simple yet so hard to do when there’s a narcissist or bullies at the event.  You know I had to bring these two characters up since they seem to follow me and my loyal readers around. 🙂    It’s still possible to use the communication strategy.

Just remember to concentrate on the people who you want to speak with during the event.  You read this correctly.  Ignore the bully or narcissist.  They will either get the idea and move to another target or try to sabotage your communication. At least you tried to stop the bully from taking over.

You need to remain in control.  Don’t let these negative behaviors stop you from enjoying others.   Remember, “You get what you tolerate!”  Tell yourself that you are in control and that you’re not going to let the “negativos” ruin your time.  Believe me when I tell you this is very hard to do.  It’s also possible because I’ve worked on this behavior many times in my own life.  My clients thank me for supporting them to gain control with these toxic people.

I want to hear from you!

Send me your questions or comments on what is and what isn’t working with your family or business gatherings.

This is Joyce Weiss, Communications Strategist and Coach
I provide personalized coaching and Premier Programs for individuals and groups.

Learn how Joyce Weiss can leverage her 30+ years of leadership consulting and coaching experience to help your organization address and discover communication strategies HERE

Until next time, Remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

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Difficult People Share The Following Behaviors

Hi, This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist and Coach and welcome to Communicate with Impact.

Due to such a great response from my viewers and readers, I created another video on how to deal with a very complicated difficult person…The Narcissist.  I suggest that you look at previous videos on my blog if you are new to Communicate with Impact.  You can start this fascinating journey with us.  Yes, I said, “fascinating!”  Many of my clients have discovered that they work or live with this difficult kind of person after watching my video series.  They are intrigued that they CAN gain control and live or work with less stress.

Enjoy the video below and make sure and comment in the comment section. 

Do The Difficult People in Your Life Show the Following Behaviors?

  • Act like everything is all about them
  • Make and break rules to fit their needs
  • Put you down
  • Demand whatever they want
  • Things have to be done their way
  • Believe they are superior to you and others
  • Crave constant praise and recognition
  • Are not empathetic to your needs
  • Can’t offer a genuine apology

Possible Results From the List Above

If you checked 6 out of 9 of the behaviors the difficult person may be a strong narcissist.  This is the toughest kind to deal with and you may not know how to deal with him or her. 

Narcissists Need to Achieve the Perfect Image

  • Recognition
  • Status
  • Being envied
  • Total self-absorption

Remember

There is definitely a pattern that most narcissists share.  The difficult person in your life may not be as strong as the ones who I cover in this series.

 I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:

A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, communication strategist,  and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com

Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist and Coach

I share powerful techniques on tackling tough conversations to build employee engagement, accountability, and improve my client’s quality of life.

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

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What Happens When You Work with a Narcissist?

Do you experience some of the situations at work or home when the same person…conflict girl pointing finger

  • Always has drama in his or her life?
  • Constantly criticizes others and never accepts responsibility?
  • Shows anger if he or she doesn’t get his or her way…just like a 2 year old child?
  • Takes up your time only with their issues and impedes your boundaries?

If so you may be working or living with a narcissist. This person is a tough one to work with and is always a challenge for participants in my Resolving Conflict in the Workplace Trainings. My clients have tried to deal with the selfish and critical team player with no success. I tell them that this disorder is one that some people NEVER are able to figure out and resolve issues. It is worth the effort to look for options in order to make your life easier. 🙂

Description of the Narcissist Personality Disorder

You will learn the characteristics in this blog post. Next week you will discover how to deal with them.

Most narcissists don’t exhibit all of the characteristics described in this article. 1 in 100 exhibit all these descriptions according to the American Psychiatric Association. Recognize when you are with someone who repeatedly evokes shame, anger, or idealizes others. You can then figure out your next step to protect yourself. Try NOT to personalize since they treat others the same way!

  1. Narcissist injury or intense sensitivity to shame
    They don’t experience shame and things are never their fault. They feel assaulted and will show rage and blame others. Please do your best to resist confrontation until you read next weeks suggestions.
  2. Devaluation of others
    Their charm draws others into their web until they drop their victim abruptly. They repair themselves by criticizing others.
  3. Envy
    They never admit that they are envious of others and feel self righteous and contempt with their colleagues or relatives. They are actually VERY insecure.
  4. Entitlement
    Their feelings and needs are all that matters. There’s no room for negotiation or reciprocity. They feel rage if they don’t get their way…just like a 2 year old.
  5. Violation of your boundaries…detach yourself
    They don’t know when they are being too personal or invasive since everything evolves around their schedules or interests. Start documenting their excuses and abuses to protect yourself since they don’t recognize that they have boundary issues. Awareness will not change the reality but it changes YOUR perspective.

Click Here to share your experiences about this challenging behavior. What kind of personality do these people have and what challenges do you find when dealing with them?

Joyce Recommends a Very Helpful Book on Narcissists

If I have peaked your interest and want to learn more information, I suggest that you read Why is Everything Always About You? Sandy Hotchkiss does an excellent job giving suggestions on how to cope with this tough individual. Look for more information next week giving you concrete suggestions on dealing with a narcissist who you may work with or live with at home.

Click Here if YOU want to read an article on Powerful Tips to Get Rid of Drainers!

I want to hear from you!

Click Here to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please Click Here to Leave a Comment or Question

Please send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Business Conflict Resolution Consultant
I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

Click Here if YOU want to read an article on Powerful Tips to Get Rid of Drainers!

 

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The Dating Drinking Discussion with Teens

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Top Level Leadership Tune Up Master E-Course

I was a guest on Mike Domitrz’s radio show-The Gift of Respect and his TV Show-Impact. I am very impressed with Mike’s important message and how he educates parents, students, teachers and the US Military on respectful dating and building mutual consent.  Mike’s company Date Safe Project has numerous resources for you to check out.

Both Mike and I help our clients understand the importance of respect. This is why I decided to share Mike’s interview with you. Many you may have children or grandchildren who are starting to date or attend college. I can remember some interesting conversations that I had with my children when they were teens! I wish that I had Mike’s tools to share with them at that time. Parents and teens need to have tough conversations and Mike’s tools teach us how to open up the door easily so we can have these important two way discussions. One of the most important keys is to have mutual respect…especially when we hear how our loved ones had to deal with people who disrespected them.

At time a few parents don’t want Mike to speak at school assemblies. The parents have told him, “My child is not involved in dating or drinking yet-my kids don’t drink or date and won’t until they get older.” Mike tells these parents that their children may not be involved at this time, yet he encourages parents to have the discussion NOW so both parents and their children will be prepared in the future.

Our actual interview is located on the link below. If you can’t open it up, I have included they key points of the interview in this blog post.

Joyce’s Radio Interview on the Mike Domitrz radio show, The Gift of Respect

Students listen to Mike…they didn’t know that they had a choice during those uncomfortable times when they go on dates. After Mike’s programs, students are well informed. They learn that they are not odd for not drinking or dating at this time in their life. They learn that even though getting mutual consent sounds “stupid” they would rather ask than have an embarrassing moment when the consent was not mutual.

Parents love his message because they learn specific skills to teach their kids when it comes to mutual consent and respect. We are not taught these important skills. He has two websites as great resources for parents, teachers and students, and the military: HelpMyTeenIsDating and DateSafeProject. People can find helpful videos and articles.

Discover how you can tackle tough conversations with negative people, bullies, or slackers by enrolling in My Top Level Leadership Tune Up: Communicate with Impact Master E-Course. Click here to see testimonials from clients who took the Course so you can get the respect that you deserve and that better night’s sleep!

 3 Main ideas teens learn after Mike’s training

1. Give your partner a choice and respect their answer. Respectfully say, “No” to him or her without sounding mean. Listen and respect their partner’s response if they say, “NO.”

2. What to do when students go to high school or middle school parties when alcohol is present. How to handle a situation when a friend is using alcohol and someone is trying to hit on him or her. Mike suggests that they intervene by distracting the aggressor. The friend can say, “Our friend had a lot to drink and we will give her or him a safe ride home.” Mike strongly suggests that a few friends do this together. They need to be positive and non-judgmental. The friends will know that they are doing the right thing if the assaulter blames them for budding in.

3. How to help by being there for friends or family members who have been assaulted. Mike tells parents not to say, “If anyone touches you, I’ll kill him or her.” The child will not go to his or her parents if they are assaulted. Instead Mike teaches parents to say, “I’m here for you and will support you any way that I can.” This keeps the door open and shows mutual respect.

How did Mike become an expert on Safe Dating?

He was studying theater in college when he received a phone call from his mother that his sister was raped. He was shocked, full of anger, and enraged. Over time he realized that he could take his anger and do something positive with this negative energy. He heard a speaker who spoke about consent. Mike started speaking to schools and the military about mutual consent and respect. He was an angry brother who turned into a VERY effective speaker full of passion to help others learn these important life skills. His sister is his inspiration. She is a true survivor. He shows people how to deal with conflict. Will they be crippled by conflict or resolve it and learn how to move on? It’s great to meet a colleague who speaks on a different topic than I do BUT who gets the same results…Be Direct with Respect®.

You can reach Mike at 800.329.9390 and mike.d@datesafeproject.org.

Want to Use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?
Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other tips or article we send, if you use the following byline: 

A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. She helps people to tackle the tough conversations to build employee engagement, accountability and rock star performance! To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com.  Her website is JoyceWeiss.com.

 Was this helpful?

Please send me any comments that you may have for this blog post. Hit the link at the end of this post to share your comments. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Please let others know about these blog posts on reducing conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life.

Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss, Conflict Resolution Consultant

 I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results. I teach them to tackle the tough conversations to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance.  The result?  My clients will a better night’s sleep!

PS  Discover how you can tackle tough conversations with negative people, bullies, or slackers by enrolling in My Top Level Leadership Tune Up:  Communicate with Impact Master E-Course.  Click here to see testimonials from clients who took the Course so you can get the respect that you deserve and that better night’s sleep!

PPS Watch Mike interview me on his TV show, Impact on WHY respect is so important to me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831