
If you’re like most people, you either think it or say it daily.
The good news is that we all have more time accessible to us.
The bad news is that we often let others steal it from us.
Consider this: International Communications Research in New York surveyed over 1,000 people on how many minutes per day
they are interrupted with things that they don’t want to do.
Over 42 percent of those surveyed admit that they spend 100 minutes or more every day on interruptions.
This breaks down to the following:
100 minutes (1-2/3 hours) per day
11-2/3 hours per week
26 days per year
5 weeks of vacation
While you can’t make up for lost time, you can have more time to do what you want to do – starting today!
The secret is to use Be Direct with Respect® principles.
Here’s how.
- When someone asks, “Can I have five minutes of your time?” the natural response is to say,
“Sure,” even though you really don’t have five minutes…and you know those five minutes will grow into 15, 20, or even 30 minutes. A better response is, “Sure, I’d love to help you. Let me call you when I’m done with this project and we can talk then.”
Now you’re still engaging the person, but you’re doing it on your terms and your timeline, not theirs.
- When someone tries to start a friendly conversation with you or engage in small talk and you don’t have the time,
the usual response is to stop what you’re doing and talk to the person. After all, you don’t want to be rude.
A better response is, “I’d love to hear more about your grand kids (or your new project, the new clients, etc.),
Right now I have a meeting (or a deadline to meet, a report to finish, a doctor’s appointment, etc.).
So let’s talk about this later today when I’m available.”
Again, it’s just a matter of redirecting the person to your timeline.
- When you have a planned one hour meeting with someone and the hour is almost up but the other person shows no intention of leaving or ending the conversation, most people would let the meeting run over, which then disrupts their entire day’s schedule.
A better approach is, “Our time is just about up. Why don’t we use the remaining few minutes to decide when we’ll meet again to complete this discussion.”
At that point the person may suddenly be able to sum up all the key points. And if additional time is needed, now you’re doing it according to your schedule.
Take Back Your Time
Being Direct with Respect® is a skill that enables you to stop interruptions at work and home in order to do the necessary tasks.
It is an art to tell others that you can’t take care of their needs without sounding like a selfish person.
When you’re direct with respect, you can do what you need and want to do and get the respect from others at the same time.
Check out our new Communicate with Impact: Be Direct with Respect ON DEMAND Course.
Was this helpful?
We want to hear from you!
Please send me your questions or comments in the comment box below… it’s all about connecting with my clients and loyal readers. 🙂
Feel free to share this article with others…just be sure to give credit to Joyce Weiss, Conflict Resolution Consultant (www.JoyceWeiss.com).Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss
and remember…YOU GET WHAT YOU TOLERATE!


amanda toy says
Hi Joyce, great tips. my question would be, if i say,” i would love to talk to you later today about your grandkids”, or ” time is almost up, when can we meet again?”. Then i am committing to them another meeting time. overall, aren’t you using less time if you just say something like,, “time is almost up, do you think you can summarize your key points, i think i can give you ten more minutes now if that is possible” That way, you are only giving ten minutes and not another 30 or 60. thoughts?
Joyce Weiss says
Thanks Amanda for your comments on this important post. I agree that your approach is another excellent option to use with people who go on and on. The most important thing is for us to say something! I find that many people let others interrupt their day and don’t know how to stop this.
As usual, you have great ideas and I welcome them again.