Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Communication Strategist and Master Coach

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5 Action Steps to Kick Conflict to the Curb

Hello, Dear Kick Conflict to the Curb Readers!

The next 3 posts will include 5 new action steps to Kick Conflict to the Curb.  The action steps come from creating content for my virtual class and coaching clients. If you want more information on any of the action steps, do a search in the search bar on this site {JoyceWeiss.com}.

There are 20 action steps in total and I look forward to hearing which ones are your favorite ones.

Action Steps # 1: Use the Power Talk Formula Team Building | ACTION STEPS

This is such an important strategy to keep in your toolbox because it works!

Here’s the Formula:
“I am…” (Your emotional response)

“When I…” (Nonjudgmental observation)

“Because…” (How it affects you)

I am frustrated when boundaries are not followed because we just conducted a meeting on this important issue for our team.

This powerful statement is all about:

  • Sharing your concern
  • It’s not judgmental or sarcastic – just stating the facts

Your next step is to go deeper with those who don’t follow the new department rules.

Action Step #2: Use Verbal Aikido

This is my clients’ favorite strategy to learn and use. I’ve heard many of you share your experience with verbal aikido and I’m thrilled about this. 🙂

Verbal Aikido:

  • Take back control when you pull back, not push back
  • Repeat the same words or agree with the bully
  • Step into the GAP-Your Safe Place to think of the best response

Action Step #3: Ask a Positive Question to the Negative Person

action steps

This action step may change the mindset of the negative person. Even if it doesn’t at least this is a reminder that you can leave the conversation if the negativity gets out of line.

A great question to use is:  “What is something good that happened to you today?”  This will force a positive response.

Action Steps #4: Create a Code of Conduct with Your Team

A code of conduct helps set the tone and expectations of everyone on the team. It’s best to have someone lead the discussion who is NOT the leader or boss. All department or team members need to be present to get a good representation and better results.

The 3 article links below will give you more details on how to use this powerful action step.

Toolbox Alert #1:  A Code of Conduct Reinforces Accountability

Toolbox Alert #2: A Code of Conduct Improves the Team

Toolbox Alert #3: A Code of Conduct Really Works

Action Steps #5: Improve Morale by Giving a Day Off to an Employee Who Finds a New Hire

This one action step will give you a lot of traction with your company.  Your employees know the company. When they recommend a friend or colleague, it works out well {most of the time} because they want to work with like-minded individuals.

Joyce, What are Your Thoughts About These 5 Action Steps?

I’m glad you asked! 😉  Verbal Aikido and the Power Talk Formula are both parts of the Weiss Communication Success Plan.  Once you learn and implement these 2 strategies, you will transform your communication from not being heard to feeling confident to use your voice.

The great news is that you will be the first group to know when I launch my next Kick Conflict to the Curb Virtual Class in April.  Look for announcements because this is where we take strategies and practice during the live classes so you can put them to use immediately.

The code of conduct and appreciating employees for bringing in new hires help improve morale because people feel heard.

Please share which action step is your favorite, so far.

Let’s stay connected 

Please share these articles and videos with your company, colleagues, friends, or family who could benefit from the content.

You are always welcome to send me an email with questions or concerns about your conflict resolution challenges. Reach out HERE  by sending me an email 

Here are 2 FREE Resources to help you Kick Conflict to the Curb:

Do you want to know how your communication skills impact your success at work?

a. Grab your FREE Communication Assessment to find out blind spots, strengths, and areas for growth.

You will receive your results from me along with 4 videos about communication strategies that you can put into action immediately.  Here’s the link:  https://www.KickConflicttoTheCurb.com.

 b. Sign up for our Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update
https://www.JoyceWeiss.com for articles about bullies, communication strategies, coaching secrets, conflict resolution case scenarios, motivational posters, interviews with thought leaders, plus so much more.

Have a GREAT Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Master Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

Remember, You Get What YOU Tolerate!

 

  

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What a Treat Interviewing Diane Bogino on Overcoming Negative Self-Talk

Hello Dear Readers!

I enjoy inviting guests to share their wisdom and experience with you. This week we are in for a real treat! The video describes how Diane Bogino helps organizations grow a healthy culture.
Her motto is, “Instead of TAKING the time to whine, MAKE the time to TAKE ACTION.”

Diane Bogino is an Industrial-Organizational Psychologist who has assisted organizations, executives, and individuals in getting out of their own way to achieve success by developing a better understanding of one another’s communication styles, behaviors, and effective business practices.

In a former life, Diane was an actress and model.  She appeared in a movie and in numerous commercials and did a national spot for Delta airlines. She also did voice-overs, print, and runway modeling. At one time she was “Daffey Diane,” (some say she still is!), a magic clown. She also performed magic as herself winning Magician of the Year for Greater Atlanta.

 

What prompted you to go into coaching and consulting

As a result of an abusive childhood, I thought I was too stupid to go to school. I went to college late in life and went into training and educating people to help them grow. This is really my passion. I have an M.A. in Industrial Psychology.  My main emphasis is the way people think and communicate – helping them work better as a team. The goal is to help people understand each other and create a better culture.

How did you change your mindset when you were a little girl coming from an abusive household?

When I was 30 I had an epiphany and said, “Life doesn’t have to be like this.” You shouldn’t think of yourself in such a negative way. I learned self-talk and now help people get out of their own way which leads them to success. I had to reverse the conversations in my own head because I thought so negatively. I would literally have to say, “STOP” out loud. It may take a while and is a good place to start.
I realized that I had so much to bring to the world

How are you able to change the company culture?

I like to start with the executive team. Assessments are a great way to start the process. I do an individual and team debrief. The team needs to understand each other. Once you have a conversation with someone else with who you have a conflict, then the healing process can begin, and you can start to communicate better with each other.

What books did you publish?

  • Finding YOUR Bootstraps: 11 Steps to Overcoming Victim Thinking
  • Secrets of Writing a Winning Resume
  • How to Give Your Meetings a Swift Kick in the Agenda
  • There’s  Something Funny About Humor in Presentations
  • Reaching Y.E.S. – Your Extraordinary Self – Unpublished

How can they reach you?

www.Performstrat.com
https://dianeboginodevelopment

linkedin.com/in/diane-bogino-b99232

Diane@dianebogino.com

404.320.7834

What parting words do you have for us?

Self-assessment is extremely important and well worth the ticket!

Let’s Stay Connected

I will interview Diane Bogino again since she has so much wisdom to share with us.

  • What part of the interview spoke to you?
  • Did you have to change your mindset in your life?
  • Share your ideas in the comment section and I will respond. :)You are the reason why I continue doing my work as a Master Coach.  Your feedback and comments show me that you return to read our blog because you are all about self-improvement and professional growth.  Send me an email anytime with questions on your own conflict resolution challenges either at home or work.

Until next time,
Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Master Coach and Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Grab your FREE communication assessment to find out how your communication impacts your success at work HERE

 

 

 

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More Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Part 2

Are you ready to hear about more coaching strategies?
Do you wonder if your communication patterns get in the way of creating trust with others?
Would you like to see if you are a rescuer who could hinder progress in others?

Ouch! Hopefully, the questions above piqued your interest. 🙂 If so, you are in the right place. 🙂

Last week you read about the work of Michael Bungay Stanier on the TELL IT Communicators. I described the TELL IT Communicator from Michael’s class during the World of Executive and Business Coaching Summit.

Here’s a link to Part 1: Coaching Strategies to Improve Your communication – Big Time!
Michael Bungay Stanier shared that there are 3 types of communicators: Tell IT, Save IT, and Control IT

This article is about the SAVE IT Communicators.

Coaching Strategies #1: SAVE IT Communication Challenges

  • Save IT Communicators are rescuers
  • They keep others from making mistakes
  • Listeners resent SAVE IT Communicators because they become codependent and don’t know how to stop the SAVE IT Communicator
  • They have all the answers

Coaching Strategies #2: SAVE IT Communication Benefits  

  • They are heroes because their purpose is to save everyone from imperfections
  • SAVE IT Communicators think they are helping others from making mistakes

Coaching Strategies #3: SAVE IT Communication Solutions

  • Stay curious and do your best to stop rescuing everyone from making mistakes
  • Realize that success consists of falling down and taking risks
  • Think before you open your mouth
  • Ask yourself if your words help or hinder the success of others
  • See how your new behavior encourages self-growth and autonomy

Joyce, What Do You Think About SAVE IT Communicators?

Full disclosure.  Drum rolls, please.  I am a SAVE IT Communicator. I discussed this awareness with a couple of coaching colleagues.  We discovered that all 3 of us are Save It Communicators. We also realized that it’s time for a change. I am NOT any of these communicators when I coach with clients or in my virtual courses.

My personal life is another story. I decided to make a change and took this awareness as a gift to myself. The last couple of weeks have been more relaxing for me and my family.  I have stopped saying, ” It’s going to be cold, so you better take your jacket.” No More Mrs. Nice Gal!” Let’s face it, it’s up to us to take care of ourselves. Our family consists of all adults. No more babies or teens to rescue for this MASTER Coach! My family has started taking their own jackets. They appreciate the fact that I’m changing – of course, I told them about this and we discussed their patterns also. Hey, it’s only fair, if I change they need to work on their growth also.

Self-awareness is a great first step towards progress.  The good news is once we discover our communication style, we can then make important changes.  Some of them are easy while others are not. I promise, there will be more information on these important coaching strategies to add to your toolbox.

Let’s Hear From You

Let’s hear how you feel about these coaching strategies. Do you see SAVE IT Communicators in your workplace or home? If so, please share your awareness and how this communication style stifles creativity, trust, and growth.

I suggest that you talk about the 3 communication styles after I describe the last one next week.  This can be a great exercise for your department or family. When you have open-minded people, this will work really well. If you have one negative person, wait until that person is not present, or else he or she can ruin the results with their sarcasm and negativity.

The comment section is working! Let’s hear from you.

You can always send me a private email with questions or concerns about the communication conflicts that you are experiencing.

Let’s Stay Connected

Do you want to go deeper and grow professionally to your next level? If so, I have several coaching packages and memberships to fit anyone’s schedule and budget.  I’d love to work with you.
Give me a call to see how coaching can help you or your direct reports to improve relationships, careers, and personal peace!

office: 800.713.1926
cell: 248.325.8101

Just think: No more

  • Drama
  • Silence
  • Not being heard
  • Unresolved tough conversations

Have a great week.

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Here’s the link to part 1 of the series Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication

 

 

 

 

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Video 8: Why I Talk About Conflict in the Workplace

Clients ask me why I talk about conflict in the workplace.

My answer is easy.  I married a lawyer.  People smile or laugh when I say this.
It sounds funny. Which is a good thing. I had to learn how to negotiate in a big way.  Like most of us, I was not trained in school how to deal with conflict or how to have tough conversations.

I’m happy to say that reading as many books as I did on how to have difficult conversations and earning respect helped pave my way to a successful marriage.  This journey trained me to coach emerging leaders, individuals, and groups on how to find their voice with Joyce. My story is unique to me.

What about you?
What is your unique story that you can share during your training or speaking engagements?  Why do you do what you do?  How did you discover your uniqueness?

Stay Connected with Me

Add a comment to my blog on what stories you use in your training or presentations?  How are you unique?

You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email
with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please contact me at my cell 248.310.6998 or 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development. There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule!   My last 4 clients have asked me to help them feel more comfortable with their public speaking skills.  It only takes a few sessions to make this happen.  Hey, what can I say?  I’m quick and clients use their new public speaking skills immediately.  A win/win for all.  🙂

Here are Links to Videos 1-7 from the Series Secrets from a Trainer How to Engage Your Audience

 

Video 1
arrive early

Video 2
sit with your audience

Video 3
how to use humor

Video 4
using props

Video 5
danger:  don’t be boring

Video 6
movement exercises

Video 7
evaluations

 

 

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!
Find your voice with Joyce!

 

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Video #4 from the Series: Secrets from a Trainer to Engage Your Audience

#communicationstrategies #publicspeaking #communicationstrategist

I do my best to add value to all my loyal readers by sharing the latest communication strategies weekly.  Welcome to the video series “Secrets from a Trainer to Engage Your Audience.  This is strategy #4:  Using props to warm up the audience.  Thanks to John Tenza,  Professional Speaker and Results Coach who has taught me the importance of using props to spice up even the dullest topic.

Communication Strategies #1:  Using large emojis humor | communication strategies

I bought the props that are in this blog from Amazon.  The emojis are perfect for my message when I open up the training on dealing with bullies and other difficult people.  The audience smiles the moment I put them in front of my face.

 Communication Strategies #2:  Using big ears

The ears will be such a success when you speak about listening and communication.  I put them on and the audience is always interested in humor | communication strategistwhere they can purchase them.  I hope that they are also listening to my message! 🙂

Stay tuned for more ideas on how to improve your presentations.  All of these ideas can be used in a small workshop or even a large keynote.

You can view videos 1-3 on the links below:
Strategy #1:  Get to the room early
Strategy #2:  Sit with the audience
Strategy #3:  How to use humor

Stay Connected with Me

Add a comment to my blog on how you use props at your speeches or training.  Let me know what challenges you experience presenting to others.  I will make new videos from your ideas by using new communication strategies.  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

You can view videos 1-3 on the links below:
Strategy #1:  Get to the room early
Strategy #2:  Sit with the audience
Strategy #3:  Add humor

Please contact me at my cell 248.310.6998 or 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development. There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule!

My last 4 clients have asked me to help them feel more comfortable with their public speaking skills.  It only takes a few sessions to make this happen.  Hey, what can I say?  I’m quick and clients use their new public speaking skills immediately.  A win/win for all.  🙂 There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule!

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831

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