Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Communication Strategist and Master Coach

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A Powerful Interview with Kristie Stocker About Leadership and Purpose

Hey, Dear Readers of Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update! 🙂

Are you ready to learn information that you can share at work about leadership and purpose?

I met our guest speaker at a National Speaker’s Association meeting a few years ago. I knew our paths would cross because she was full of energy, leadership skills, and so much fun.  Pop some popcorn and learn from Kristie Stocker – success coach and leadership speaker.

Here’s the video.

Here are the Questions that I asked Kristie About Leadership and Purpose:

{You will find more details on the video – this is the readers’ digest portion. :)}

1.  The word purpose is thrown around all the time, it seems a bit “woo”. Is it really that important to weave into the business world?
Kristie’s Answer:  “Purpose for the team AND company is necessary.”

2.  Can someone’s purpose change?
Kristie’s Answer:  “Yes! Different life experiences, situations, and happiness equals innovation.  Individuals and companies change their purpose due to so many factors.

3.  What happens when they don’t have a sense of purpose?
Kristie’s answer:  “Tell-tale signs like turnover, lack of engagement, no sense of community, and even mental health are all influences on purpose.

4.  What can leaders do to connect more with their purpose?
Kristie’s answer: “Don’t be afraid to ask the tough questions and go deep.”

5. How can leaders help their employees?
Kristie’s answer: “Understand motivators, personalities, pair their strengths, coach them to grow, and don’t be afraid to let them go.”

About Kristie Stocker

Kristie comes with 20 years of past experience in corporate communications for a multi-billion dollar corporation and has been coaching driven professionals since 2002 to advance their self-leadership skills to unbelievable levels.  Her clients like Bosch, Lockheed-martin Leadership Association, Institute of Management Accountants, and National Management Association know Kristie as the expert in helping them become excuse-breaking, fear-crushing, goal-exceeding leaders.

When she’s not mentoring high-achievers to be rock star leaders or hosting her leadership show, “Kristie TV” on YouTube, she’s helping clients connect with their powerful purpose.

Here’s how to get in touch with Kristie:
https://KristieStocker.com
HTTP://Kristietv.com

Let’s Stay Connected!

What are some of your questions about the interview?  Those of you who share either in the comment section below or send me an email will receive a new video (that I have not posted yet) about using props to engage your virtual meetings. It’s short and contains tips to liven up your virtual meetings.

Hey, Dear Readers, I’m here for you when you have questions about your own communication or relationship “challenges.” Feel free to send me an email. Full disclosure here:  I don’t charge anything when people send me questions or comments via email. Staying connected is what it’s all about for me.

Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Master Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Career Advancement is like riding a bike: Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!

P.P.S. Here’s a link to a past post that pairs well with this article on The Importance of Humility

P.P.P.S. If you need more clarity and direction on becoming a more confident and purposeful leader, book a FREE 50-minute leadership session with Kristie. You’ll discuss your current challenges, goals, and exact next steps you can take to be the leader you’re meant to be. Spots are limited for these sessions so book it here: https://kristiestocker.as.me/leadership50

 

 

 

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Even More Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Part 3

Thanks for the feedback about enjoying parts 1 and 2 of the series “Coaching Strategies to Improve your Communication – Big Time!”

I received this great information from Michael Bungay Stanier who is part of the World of Business and Executive Coaching Summit.  I share the best information from the Summit with you because if I find it fascinating, I sure hope you do too. 🙂

Week 1 is about the Tell It Communicator.  Week 2 describes the Save IT Communicator.  The links to both of the articles are below:

Week 1: The Tell It Communicator Article
Week 2: The Save It Communicator Article

Coaching Strategies #1:  Description of Control It Communicators

Control It Communicators maintain their control 100% of the time.  Tell It Communicators give solutions and are all-knowing. They don’t maintain control as much as the Control It Communicators.
My class – Kick Conflict to the Curb enjoyed an energetic discussion on the difference in all 3 communicators. They had to decide which style was most like them. Last week I revealed that I’m more of a Save It Communicator and rescue family and friends from getting hurt. I now know that they don’t need or appreciate rescuing! Who knew? I thought it was a good thing. Each person has at least one style and could use all 3 at different times. We went deep during the class and discovered that every participant learned that their style had both prizes and punishments.

Coaching Strategies #2:  Punishments of being a Control It Communicatorcoaching strategies

  • You won’t get to the real issues because there is no discussion
  • Bottlenecks are formed due to a lack of open communication, trust, and creativity
  • People who are controlled end up closing down and resentment appears

Coaching Strategies #3:  Prizes of being a Control It Communicator

  • Control It Communicators think that their power will make others feel safe
  • Time is saved because there is not a discussion – not really a prize. 🙁
  • Control It Communicators feel strong and efficient

So Joyce, What Do You Think About Tell It, Save It, and Control It Communicators?

I highly recommend Michael Bungay Stanier’s book, Taming The Advice Monster. It’s a great read. The information from this article came from Michael’s lecture at the Coaching Summit.
At times in our life, we can be all 3 communicators.  We usually use one communication style more than others.

Here’s a great exercise that you can use with your family, work team, or friends – that is if they are open to these kinds of discussions.  First, describe all 3 communication styles.

  • Have everyone decide what kind of communication style they use
  • Ask them to write down what communication style they think the other members use
  • This is the moment when you need to act like a coach
  • Let them know that this discussion needs to be positive without blaming and judgment
  • Hopefully, the discussion will be light-hearted
  • Start discussing the prizes and punishments for all 3 styles.  You will find details in the 3 articles and the 2 links at the end of this article
  • Next comes the best part. Everyone shares how they can change their style and what awareness they learned about themselves

You can always ask me to help you with this exercise during an online customized training for you and your team.  We will have an engaging experience and you will get long-lasting results.  Sound good? Call me at 800.713.1926 or send me an email HERE.

Let’s Stay Connected

Please share which communication style you “own!”

  • What did you learn about yourself?
  • How will you use this information to grow professionally?
  • How do you think this style has held you back?

Send me an email HERE if you have a communication issue that you want to resolve.  You are not imposing if you send me information or ask questions. I love connecting with all of you.

Here are the 2 links to the previous articles;
Week 1: The Tell It Communicator Article
Week 2: The Save It Communicator Article

Hope You Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Master Coach and Communication Strategist

Remember, You Get What YOU Tolerate!

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More Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Part 2

Are you ready to hear about more coaching strategies?
Do you wonder if your communication patterns get in the way of creating trust with others?
Would you like to see if you are a rescuer who could hinder progress in others?

Ouch! Hopefully, the questions above piqued your interest. 🙂 If so, you are in the right place. 🙂

Last week you read about the work of Michael Bungay Stanier on the TELL IT Communicators. I described the TELL IT Communicator from Michael’s class during the World of Executive and Business Coaching Summit.

Here’s a link to Part 1: Coaching Strategies to Improve Your communication – Big Time!
Michael Bungay Stanier shared that there are 3 types of communicators: Tell IT, Save IT, and Control IT

This article is about the SAVE IT Communicators.

Coaching Strategies #1: SAVE IT Communication Challenges

  • Save IT Communicators are rescuers
  • They keep others from making mistakes
  • Listeners resent SAVE IT Communicators because they become codependent and don’t know how to stop the SAVE IT Communicator
  • They have all the answers

Coaching Strategies #2: SAVE IT Communication Benefits  

  • They are heroes because their purpose is to save everyone from imperfections
  • SAVE IT Communicators think they are helping others from making mistakes

Coaching Strategies #3: SAVE IT Communication Solutions

  • Stay curious and do your best to stop rescuing everyone from making mistakes
  • Realize that success consists of falling down and taking risks
  • Think before you open your mouth
  • Ask yourself if your words help or hinder the success of others
  • See how your new behavior encourages self-growth and autonomy

Joyce, What Do You Think About SAVE IT Communicators?

Full disclosure.  Drum rolls, please.  I am a SAVE IT Communicator. I discussed this awareness with a couple of coaching colleagues.  We discovered that all 3 of us are Save It Communicators. We also realized that it’s time for a change. I am NOT any of these communicators when I coach with clients or in my virtual courses.

My personal life is another story. I decided to make a change and took this awareness as a gift to myself. The last couple of weeks have been more relaxing for me and my family.  I have stopped saying, ” It’s going to be cold, so you better take your jacket.” No More Mrs. Nice Gal!” Let’s face it, it’s up to us to take care of ourselves. Our family consists of all adults. No more babies or teens to rescue for this MASTER Coach! My family has started taking their own jackets. They appreciate the fact that I’m changing – of course, I told them about this and we discussed their patterns also. Hey, it’s only fair, if I change they need to work on their growth also.

Self-awareness is a great first step towards progress.  The good news is once we discover our communication style, we can then make important changes.  Some of them are easy while others are not. I promise, there will be more information on these important coaching strategies to add to your toolbox.

Let’s Hear From You

Let’s hear how you feel about these coaching strategies. Do you see SAVE IT Communicators in your workplace or home? If so, please share your awareness and how this communication style stifles creativity, trust, and growth.

I suggest that you talk about the 3 communication styles after I describe the last one next week.  This can be a great exercise for your department or family. When you have open-minded people, this will work really well. If you have one negative person, wait until that person is not present, or else he or she can ruin the results with their sarcasm and negativity.

The comment section is working! Let’s hear from you.

You can always send me a private email with questions or concerns about the communication conflicts that you are experiencing.

Let’s Stay Connected

Do you want to go deeper and grow professionally to your next level? If so, I have several coaching packages and memberships to fit anyone’s schedule and budget.  I’d love to work with you.
Give me a call to see how coaching can help you or your direct reports to improve relationships, careers, and personal peace!

office: 800.713.1926
cell: 248.325.8101

Just think: No more

  • Drama
  • Silence
  • Not being heard
  • Unresolved tough conversations

Have a great week.

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Here’s the link to part 1 of the series Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication

 

 

 

 

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Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Big Time!

  • Are you ready to hear about new communication and coaching strategies?
  • Do you wonder if your communication patterns get you in trouble without even knowing it?
  • Would you like to know how you can get better results in your communication with just a minor tweak?
  • If so, this article can be a good step for your professional growth journey.

I’m a proud member of WBECS (World of Business and Executive Coaching Summit). Learning from the top master coaches and top communication gurus is something that I cherish.  The benefit for my readers and clients is that I share the BEST coaching strategies that they can put to use in their life. My clients who are taking our virtual communication course: Kick Conflict to the Curb: Get the Respect You Deserve benefit from the latest information that you will find in this article.

Michael Bungay Stanier shared his research for his book, Taming the Advice Monster with the 2000+ Master Coaches during his session. The content is compelling for people who have a growth mindset and know that the “best can only get better!” You are in this category because you signed up for our Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update, plus I know many of you who never stop learning.
Here we go. 🙂

Coaching Strategies #1: There are Three Types of Communication Categories

  1. Tell It
  2. Save It
  3. Control It

You’ll learn about Tell It in this article. Save It and Control It will be covered in the next two weeks. Make sure and read the next two articles to see which style seems more like you. We will go over all three styles so you can see how you can become a master communicator.

Coaching Strategies #2: Tell It Communication Challenges

  • Tell IT Communicators actually stop learning for the listener
  • Listening is nonexistent because the communicator tells others what to do
  • The listener has little confidence because the Tell It communicator only cares about talking and telling-there is no clear intent to support

Coaching Strategies #3:  Tell It Communication Benefits

Tell It Communicators:

  • Look brilliant
  • Save time because solutions are given and not discussed
  • Boost their ego while stopping others from growing

Coaching Strategies #4:  Tell It Communication Solutions

  • Stay curious and do your best to listen and not tell others what to do (this is NOT easy to do – BUT possible :))
  • Slow down your action and advice
  • See how this change in the Tell It Communication encourages self-growth and autonomy

Joyce What Do You Think About Tell It Communicators?

30+ years of coaching clients have shown me that we have many Tell It Communicators. Tell It Communicators are fortunate when their supervisor points out this communication weakness. Self-awareness is a great first step towards progress. The first question I ask new clients is “How do you see yourself as a communicator?” I share the 3 choices of Tell It, Save It, and Control It. At times we show all 3 communication styles. There is usually one choice that we use more often.

Full disclosure: My communication style is NOT Tell It. I will share mine as we continue this discussion for the next 2 weeks. 🙂

The good news is once we discover our communication style, we can then make important changes. Some of them are easy while others are not. I promise, there will be more information on these important
coaching strategies.

Let’s Hear From YOU

Let’s hear how you feel about these coaching strategies. Do you see Tell It Communicators in your workplace or home? If so, please share your awareness and how this communication style stifles creativity, trust, and growth. The comment section is working! It wasn’t for a few weeks until one of my loyal readers let us know.  Thanks! You can always send me a private email with questions or concerns about communication conflicts you are experiencing.

Let’s Stay Connected

Do you want to go deeper and grow professionally to your next level? If so, I have several coaching packages to fit anyone’s schedule and budget. I’d love to work with you.
Call: 800.713.1926
Text: 248.325.8101
Email; Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com

For more information visit my coaching services HERE and let’s go Kick Conflict to the Curb together.  Coaching is also perfect for your direct reports, emerging leaders, and family members who you feel will benefit from working with me for only a few sessions. Clients find that we work hard and fast. My communication system is proven, trademarked, and so darn results-oriented. ;

Don’t take my word, read what a satisfied client has to say:

Joyce is committed to helping you achieve whatever goals you set for yourself. I am very pleased with the results that she has helped me to achieve in both my professional career and my personal life in just three months. It was a great experience working with Joyce and I absolutely recommend her!

– Yadira Batlle-Gomez, Generalist & Spanish Linguist

Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

PS Remember, You get what you tolerate!

 

 

 

 

Contact Joyce

Joyce Weiss
6737 Oyster Cove
West Bloomfield, MI 48323

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 1-248-681-5831

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