Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Communication Strategist and Master Coach

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Even More Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Part 3

Thanks for the feedback about enjoying parts 1 and 2 of the series “Coaching Strategies to Improve your Communication – Big Time!”

I received this great information from Michael Bungay Stanier who is part of the World of Business and Executive Coaching Summit.  I share the best information from the Summit with you because if I find it fascinating, I sure hope you do too. 🙂

Week 1 is about the Tell It Communicator.  Week 2 describes the Save IT Communicator.  The links to both of the articles are below:

Week 1: The Tell It Communicator Article
Week 2: The Save It Communicator Article

Coaching Strategies #1:  Description of Control It Communicators

Control It Communicators maintain their control 100% of the time.  Tell It Communicators give solutions and are all-knowing. They don’t maintain control as much as the Control It Communicators.
My class – Kick Conflict to the Curb enjoyed an energetic discussion on the difference in all 3 communicators. They had to decide which style was most like them. Last week I revealed that I’m more of a Save It Communicator and rescue family and friends from getting hurt. I now know that they don’t need or appreciate rescuing! Who knew? I thought it was a good thing. Each person has at least one style and could use all 3 at different times. We went deep during the class and discovered that every participant learned that their style had both prizes and punishments.

Coaching Strategies #2:  Punishments of being a Control It Communicatorcoaching strategies

  • You won’t get to the real issues because there is no discussion
  • Bottlenecks are formed due to a lack of open communication, trust, and creativity
  • People who are controlled end up closing down and resentment appears

Coaching Strategies #3:  Prizes of being a Control It Communicator

  • Control It Communicators think that their power will make others feel safe
  • Time is saved because there is not a discussion – not really a prize. 🙁
  • Control It Communicators feel strong and efficient

So Joyce, What Do You Think About Tell It, Save It, and Control It Communicators?

I highly recommend Michael Bungay Stanier’s book, Taming The Advice Monster. It’s a great read. The information from this article came from Michael’s lecture at the Coaching Summit.
At times in our life, we can be all 3 communicators.  We usually use one communication style more than others.

Here’s a great exercise that you can use with your family, work team, or friends – that is if they are open to these kinds of discussions.  First, describe all 3 communication styles.

  • Have everyone decide what kind of communication style they use
  • Ask them to write down what communication style they think the other members use
  • This is the moment when you need to act like a coach
  • Let them know that this discussion needs to be positive without blaming and judgment
  • Hopefully, the discussion will be light-hearted
  • Start discussing the prizes and punishments for all 3 styles.  You will find details in the 3 articles and the 2 links at the end of this article
  • Next comes the best part. Everyone shares how they can change their style and what awareness they learned about themselves

You can always ask me to help you with this exercise during an online customized training for you and your team.  We will have an engaging experience and you will get long-lasting results.  Sound good? Call me at 800.713.1926 or send me an email HERE.

Let’s Stay Connected

Please share which communication style you “own!”

  • What did you learn about yourself?
  • How will you use this information to grow professionally?
  • How do you think this style has held you back?

Send me an email HERE if you have a communication issue that you want to resolve.  You are not imposing if you send me information or ask questions. I love connecting with all of you.

Here are the 2 links to the previous articles;
Week 1: The Tell It Communicator Article
Week 2: The Save It Communicator Article

Hope You Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Master Coach and Communication Strategist

Remember, You Get What YOU Tolerate!

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Coaching Strategies to Improve Your Communication – Big Time!

  • Are you ready to hear about new communication and coaching strategies?
  • Do you wonder if your communication patterns get you in trouble without even knowing it?
  • Would you like to know how you can get better results in your communication with just a minor tweak?
  • If so, this article can be a good step for your professional growth journey.

I’m a proud member of WBECS (World of Business and Executive Coaching Summit). Learning from the top master coaches and top communication gurus is something that I cherish.  The benefit for my readers and clients is that I share the BEST coaching strategies that they can put to use in their life. My clients who are taking our virtual communication course: Kick Conflict to the Curb: Get the Respect You Deserve benefit from the latest information that you will find in this article.

Michael Bungay Stanier shared his research for his book, Taming the Advice Monster with the 2000+ Master Coaches during his session. The content is compelling for people who have a growth mindset and know that the “best can only get better!” You are in this category because you signed up for our Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update, plus I know many of you who never stop learning.
Here we go. 🙂

Coaching Strategies #1: There are Three Types of Communication Categories

  1. Tell It
  2. Save It
  3. Control It

You’ll learn about Tell It in this article. Save It and Control It will be covered in the next two weeks. Make sure and read the next two articles to see which style seems more like you. We will go over all three styles so you can see how you can become a master communicator.

Coaching Strategies #2: Tell It Communication Challenges

  • Tell IT Communicators actually stop learning for the listener
  • Listening is nonexistent because the communicator tells others what to do
  • The listener has little confidence because the Tell It communicator only cares about talking and telling-there is no clear intent to support

Coaching Strategies #3:  Tell It Communication Benefits

Tell It Communicators:

  • Look brilliant
  • Save time because solutions are given and not discussed
  • Boost their ego while stopping others from growing

Coaching Strategies #4:  Tell It Communication Solutions

  • Stay curious and do your best to listen and not tell others what to do (this is NOT easy to do – BUT possible :))
  • Slow down your action and advice
  • See how this change in the Tell It Communication encourages self-growth and autonomy

Joyce What Do You Think About Tell It Communicators?

30+ years of coaching clients have shown me that we have many Tell It Communicators. Tell It Communicators are fortunate when their supervisor points out this communication weakness. Self-awareness is a great first step towards progress. The first question I ask new clients is “How do you see yourself as a communicator?” I share the 3 choices of Tell It, Save It, and Control It. At times we show all 3 communication styles. There is usually one choice that we use more often.

Full disclosure: My communication style is NOT Tell It. I will share mine as we continue this discussion for the next 2 weeks. 🙂

The good news is once we discover our communication style, we can then make important changes. Some of them are easy while others are not. I promise, there will be more information on these important
coaching strategies.

Let’s Hear From YOU

Let’s hear how you feel about these coaching strategies. Do you see Tell It Communicators in your workplace or home? If so, please share your awareness and how this communication style stifles creativity, trust, and growth. The comment section is working! It wasn’t for a few weeks until one of my loyal readers let us know.  Thanks! You can always send me a private email with questions or concerns about communication conflicts you are experiencing.

Let’s Stay Connected

Do you want to go deeper and grow professionally to your next level? If so, I have several coaching packages to fit anyone’s schedule and budget. I’d love to work with you.
Call: 800.713.1926
Text: 248.325.8101
Email; Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com

For more information visit my coaching services HERE and let’s go Kick Conflict to the Curb together.  Coaching is also perfect for your direct reports, emerging leaders, and family members who you feel will benefit from working with me for only a few sessions. Clients find that we work hard and fast. My communication system is proven, trademarked, and so darn results-oriented. ;

Don’t take my word, read what a satisfied client has to say:

Joyce is committed to helping you achieve whatever goals you set for yourself. I am very pleased with the results that she has helped me to achieve in both my professional career and my personal life in just three months. It was a great experience working with Joyce and I absolutely recommend her!

– Yadira Batlle-Gomez, Generalist & Spanish Linguist

Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

PS Remember, You get what you tolerate!

 

 

 

 

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A Motivational Quote to Keep You Going Even During Dark Times

I recently saw the motivational quote below and knew that I needed to make a poster for my loyal readers!  This post was written during the pandemic of 2020. The message is necessary more so than ever before. Certain friends know that when we get together (at a distance, of course) I don’t mind talking about the latest news – ONLY if it’s for a few minutes and NOT the entire evening. I’m sure you or even some of your friends, colleagues, or family are glued to the TV for hours. This is dangerous for our mental health. Being informed is mandatory in my book. Concentrating on all the negativity is crippling.

Coaching clients see that they are putting themselves in harm’s way when they only concentrate on the darkness.  It’s hard work to change our attitudes.  So hard.  It’s possible when we put our minds on high alert that we can get unstuck and actually find opportunities even during the darkness. I’m hearing patterns after I ask clients, “How have you changed during this pandemic – both positively and negatively?”

      Here are some of the negative responses 

  • I’m having trouble sleeping
  • I’m worried about bills
  • I hope my relative doesn’t get the virus
  • I’m concerned about money or my job
  • I’m afraid that the virus will last a long time
  • Our kids miss their social life and this pandemic is affecting them

    Here are some of the positive responses 

  • I appreciate my family more than ever before
  • I’m taking care of myself by exercising more
  • I’m taking advantage of this new virtual world by taking powerful classes
  • I’m rethinking my career

motivational quote

Why this motivational quote means so much to me

Many of you have seen several posts about launching my Online Course: Kick Conflict to the Curb: Get the Respect You Deserve. This idea came out of the pandemic. I was one of the lucky ones who joined several online courses with top-notch trainers.  Gina Carr, Terry Brock, and Bob Pike have helped me focus on an entirely new career – virtual training. It was difficult finding time to attend all the classes because I was still working with coaching clients even during this dark time. Of course, I didn’t know at the time how impactful this training was going to be for me. I just knew I had to do something to make sure I didn’t get pulled into all the craziness.

My next course starts on September 15th. I’m keeping this class small to concentrate on the needs of each person who signs up. That’s why seating is limited. September 10th is when registration closes. Please visit my landing page HERE to find out if the class is right for you or your direct reports.

I’m here to answer your questions and to share all the exciting details including that each participant will have a laser-focused 60-minute phone coaching session with me.  30 minutes when the class starts to set goals and discuss current conflicts and 30 minutes with me at the end of the class to make sure you reach your goals.

How Does the Motivational Quote Speak to You?

  • How has the pandemic changed you both positively and negatively?
  • What do you do to stay balanced during the light and dark of the pandemic?

I encourage you to reach out to me with questions about your own conflict resolution issues or for direct reports. Don’t worry, I will not sell you anything when you call! This master coach and communication strategist loves what I do and I care about clients and advocates.  My cell;  248.325.8101.

Have a GREAT Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
The Queen of Conflict Resolution

 

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How to Have a Tough Talk with Emerging Leaders who Ask for a Promotion When They are Not Ready

Would you like to learn a strategy on how to handle a conversation with emerging leaders who think they are ready for a promotion?
Do you know how to handle this situation when you know these emerging leaders don’t have the right skills for career advancement yet?

If so, you are in the right place.

The video below describes a tough conversation that my client had to create with one of her direct reports who is an emerging leader.
Enjoy the message and make sure and share your thoughts below.

Emerging Leaders Story Background

As a career coach, I recently spoke to Beth – HR Director who is experiencing this dilemma with Bruce.  Bruce is a very capable manager who has much potential for growth.  She called me because she didn’t know how to handle this emerging leader.  She wanted to set him straight without stopping his desire to grow.

So Joyce, How did You Help Beth with her Emerging Leaders? 

We discussed that we all have blind spots and at times we don’t realize how others see us.  At times we think we are better than we really are and visa versa. Beth’s dilemma was that she needed to be direct and truthful while respecting his desire to grow.  Bruce thought he was ready to become a Director when Beth knew he needed to sharpen his communication skills.

Beth was thrilled that we spoke because we practiced what she would say to Bruce.

Bruce, I don’t want to curb your desire for career development.  I applaud you for this.
I do want to suggest taking a course on leadership to hone your communication skills. 
You have great potential.  Let’s discuss your next move in a few months after you take a few courses.

Bruce “got it.”  Beth did a great job and was direct while being honorable to his desire to grow.

Stay Connected with Me

Add a comment to my blog on how you had to have a tough conversation with emerging leaders who were not ready for that desired promotion.  What stories or expressions help you? You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please contact me on my cell: 248.310.6998 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development. There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule!

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!  Find your voice with Joyce!

 

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Video #1 in the Series: Secrets from a Trainer on how to Engage Your Audience

#communicationstrategies #engageyouraudience #publicspeakingtips

 

Welcome to my new video series:  Communication Strategies and Secrets from a Communication Strategist on how to Engage your Audience.  Tip 1 is so easy.  Arrive early at the room where you will be giving your presentation.  Communication strategies are important topics for my loyal readers and I do my best to address valuable ideas to fit their needs! 🙂

Communication Strategies #1:  Get comfortable with the room

Check out the chairs and seating arrangements.  Do you want your audience to sit in a circle, round tables or classroom style?  It makes a difference on the formality of your style, audience size,  and topic.  Practice with the microphone to make sure it is working and that there are no speakers in the ceiling that will make squeaky sounds.  Most hotels have staff dedicated to audiovisual issues.

Communication Strategies #2:  Greet your audience

Once you feel comfortable with the room set up, stand in the doorway and greet your audience.  This one idea will increase your audience communication strategiesengagement.  You can ask them the following questions to warm them up to you:

  • Why did you sign up for your session? That is if they had a choice to select from.
  • What do you hope to learn from me today?
  • What message do your peers need to hear from me?

You will gather great information to use to show your audience that you care about them.
Ask them if you can call on them especially if they have a great idea to share.

Stay tuned for more ideas on how to improve your presentations.  All of these ideas can be used in a small workshop or even a large keynote.

Stay Connected with Me

Add a comment to my blog on what you do to make the room comfortable for you and your audience.  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please contact me on my cell at 248.310.6998 or 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development.  Lately clients have called to help them improve their public speaking skills.  It only took a few sessions and they were pleased with the results.  There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule! 🙂

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!

 

 

 

 

Contact Joyce

Joyce Weiss
6737 Oyster Cove
West Bloomfield, MI 48323

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 1-248-681-5831

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