- Are you ready to learn and implement 2 of my favorite communication tools?
- Do you want to hear inside coaching secrets on how clients have improved their success at work after using these powerful conflict resolution skills?
If you saw my blog post last week, you read all about the September 15, 2020 launch of my online class – Kick Conflict to the Curb. This week you will experience 2 of my favorite conflict resolution skills and tools. It includes 2 videos on how to use Verbal Aikido and Be Direct with Respect®. Please let me know how I can help you decide if the class is right for you or your direct reports.
Conflict Resolution Skills #1: Verbal Aikido
Verbal Aikido is a conflict resolution skill that helps you gain control when someone pushes your hot buttons. The person who pulls back when he or she is pushed is the stronger one in the conversation. Here’s an incident that happened to me during a conflict resolution program with first responders. I was speaking about verbal aikido when an angry participant stood up and said, “Joyce, you seem like a nice lady, but this will not work on the streets.” I said to myself, “Joyce, you teach this stuff, use verbal aikido!” I said, “You’re right, this strategy won’t work on the streets. It will work in your office with your colleagues and direct reports.” The participant relaxed and smiled and said, “Joyce YOU are right. Thanks for setting me straight.”
You’re right are words that diffuse the hostile person. We don’t need to agree with someone if they are NOT right. If they are correct, try doing this next time and you will see the other person stop pushing back. Hey, I know this stuff works, because I only coach skills that I’ve tried in my own life! 🙂 Check out verbal aikido in the search bar to the right to find more articles and videos on this important conflict resolution skill.
Conflict Resolution Skills #2: Be Direct with Respect®
Be Direct with Respect® is my secret sauce. Clients have been using this trademark of mine for over 30 years! It’s powerful and easy to use. This is the formula:
I am_____________________________________(your emotional response)
When____________________________________(non-judgmental)
Because__________________________________(how it affects you)
The story below gives you a perfect example that one of my clients used with her boss after he ridiculed her in front of her direct reports. After practicing this tool during the online course – Kick Conflict to the Curb she felt comfortable with her new skill. She was ready to speak to her boss. “Ron, I was embarrassed when I was ridiculed in front of my direct reports because it discounted my leadership role. I appreciate constructive feedback because that’s how I’ve grown professionally. I would appreciate it if you speak to me privately in the future.” Ron was impressed with her direct and respectful communication.
Let’s Stay Connected
Please let me know your questions about Kick Conflict to the Curb to see if the class is right for you or your direct reports. The cool thing is that we can create your private course with your team – just think, less stress, drama, and MORE peace! Send me a private email on what stress or conflict issues you are experiencing and how I can help you learn and implement powerful conflict resolution skills.
Until next week,
Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Conflict Resolution Queen
Communication Strategist and Master Coach
Remember, You Get What YOU Tolerate!