Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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Workplace Bullying:  2 Steps to Overcome It and Fight Back | Part 1

This is Part 1 in a series of blogs that cover workplace bullying.

  • Do you have bullies at work?
  • Are you a target for these dangerous people?
  • What do leaders do to stop bullies?

    Indian Activist Gandhi said, “Bullies are always found where there are cowards.”

    This quote speaks such truth.  Bullies are like spoiled children who are jealous of others on the playground.


Facts About Workplace Bullying workplace bullies |challenges at work | bullies in the workplace

Bullying is a form of violence. In addition, they don’t have to throw a single punch to do lasting damage to another person’s heath. Plus, they affect your organization’s fiscal health.

Bullying is experienced by more than ⅓ of the Us workforce. And it is 4 times more prevalent than illegal harassment.

These facts must be shared with leaders who let workforce bullies get away with their behavior. Coaching clients who are not leaders share these facts with their boss.

A Description of  Workplace Bullying

  • Sabotage over a significant amount of time
  • Verbal Abuse
  • Intimidation
  • Humiliation

Mistreatment severe enough to compromise a worker’s health and interpersonal Destruction are both devastating for the bully’s target.

Add all of these together, and you’ll discover it’s about the bully’s agenda!

Look for more strategies next week on fighting back against workplace bullies.

Let’s Stay Connected

Please comment about this week’s post. How does it resonate with you?
You can share in the comment section or send me a private email HERE.

You are my loyal readers and are always welcome to contact me for a complimentary 20-minute session. Let’s start a great
discussion to discover how you can stop feeling stuck anywhere in your life.

Until Next Time, Be Well and Happy!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

P.S. Please share this post on your social media. As a result, other growth-minded people can reduce their high drama and inner stress.
We made it easy for you. The shareable social media links are below.

P.P.S. Subscribe to my YouTube channel www.youtube.com/joyceweiss for more tips and strategies for you or your direct reports
to reduce stress and conflict. You’ll find playlists on dealing with bullies, tough conversations, and interviews with thought-provoking Department Managers and Leaders and leaders.

Thanks for reading, and remember: You get what YOU tolerate!

 

 

 

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Video #7: Verbal Aikido to Stop Bullies from Making You Feel Defensive

#bulliesintheworkplace #coach #verbalaikido

I have an important question for you:
Do you want to add an easy strategy in your tool-box to gain control with difficult people and bullies in the workplace?

Welcome to video #7 in the series “Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace”:  Verbal Aikido to gain control with bullies and difficult people. Today I’ll share how you can pull back when others push you with their negativity

Bullies in the Workplace Strategy #1:  At Times we Need to Bully the Bully

You heard me right.  Bullies admire those who speak with strength and don’t let bullies get away with their negative behavior. bullies in the workplace

Here’s an example I used with my coaching client who was tired of feeling defensive all the time when a bully constantly pushed her.

The bully said, “All our managers don’t know anything about how hard it is to work with our demanding clients.”  My client used to push back by saying, “How can you say that?” – pushing back.  She learned this new approach below after only a couple of sessions.

She agreed with the bully.  For example, “You’re right.  We may not understand how tough it is with these unhappy clients – please let me know how we can support your efforts.” This is an example of Verbal Aikido.  Pulling back and not pushing back.  I always say that it’s a huge risk using these strategies with bullies.  I also know that when it works out, it’s worth the risk.

Stay tuned for more examples of how clients gained control by using verbal aikido.

Bullies in the Workplace Strategy #2:  Work with a Communication Strategist

You may be ready or you know someone who wants to explore working with a career coach or communication strategist to go deep and bullies in the workplaceresolve communication challenges with difficult people or bullies in the workplace.  If you want to explore options working with me as your private coach or anyone who you feel could benefit from a few sessions – call me at 800.713.1926.  We will send you a new brochure that describes how coaching could be a good next step.

Find your voice with Joyce

Do you know how your communication impacts your success at work?  Take the FREE Communication assessment HERE and you will receive your scores immediately.  I will send you an email after you take the assessment with ideas that you can use to improve your communication skills.

Let’s connect on LinkedIn HERE.  You will find my article on Verbal Aikido on my LinkedIn profile HERE

Until next time,
Joyce Weiss, M.A. CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week
Remember…you get what you tolerate!

 

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Video 6: Changing our Attitudes to Protect Ourselves from Bullies in the Workplace

Does your attitude affect how you deal or don’t deal with bullies in the workplace?

Welcome to video #6 in the series “Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace.”  This week’s post and video describe how our attitude affects our communication when we deal with bullies.  I know this is nothing new!  It’s all about attitude!

The better we feel about ourselves, the fewer times we have to knock someone down in order to feel tall!
Odetta, American Singer, and Actor
I would like to give bullies Odetta’s quote – wouldn’t you?

Strategy #1:  How Your Attitude Affects Your Interactions with Bullies

One of my coaching clients practiced how to make conversations safe with me before he had the tough conversation.  His bully actually listened to him after the interaction.  This bully was not aware that his words hurt others.  No one had the nerve to speak with him.  My client did and the bully now has respect for him.  Instead of saying, “Why do you like insulting our team members?”  He changed this to, “Let’s all discuss how we can communicate better with everyone on our team.”  The bully was included in the conversation and the team opened up with solid solutions and deep conversations.  A win/win was the result.

Strategy #2:  How Your Attitude Affects Your Interactions with Bullies

What can you do?

  • Stop complaining about the bully to others
  • Create a plan
  • Go to leadership
  • Practice the communication skills that you learned in the seriesYou can search for the entire series – Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace on the links below:
    LinkedIn, My YouTube Channel or This Blog:

Here’s a disclaimer!  It’s always a risk to have tough conversations.  At least you tried!  You didn’t stand still and take the constant sarcasm or criticism from this difficult person.

I want to Hear From You

Add a comment to my blog on how you deal with negative people on your team.  What stories or expressions help you?  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Stay Connected with Joyce

Click the link for more information on how I can help you and your team with bullies in the workplace,
Please contact me at 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development.
There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule! 🙂

Send me an email
I will send you an article on Wave Goodbye to Workplace Feuds.

 

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

I hope you have a great week!

 

 

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Video # 4: Does Your Organization Have A Process to Deal with Bullies?

https://youtu.be/omVREQe139M

#bullies #bulliesintheworkplace #coach #careercoach #communicationstrategist

Welcome to video #4 in the series – Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace

Does your company have a process to deal with bullies in the workplace?

This video and article describe 4 different levels of intervention.  Clients who use this process have seen positive results because leaders can address the bully with this system. It’s never easy having these tough conversations.  Leaders who don’t know how or who sweep these meetings under the rug eventually see the morale go down the tubes.

Productive individuals have left former jobs when leaders did nothing with bullies or other difficult people.  They found jobs in organizations where leaders know the importance of direct communication and accountability.  How many of your star employees have left your company?  I hope that these strategies will stop this from happening in the future.

You will find links to the other videos that you may have missed at the end of the article.

How to stop bullies in the workplace intervention #1:  Informal Intervention

  • Talk to your bully over coffee or in your office.
  • Describe the disruptive behavior without sounding too critical.
  • The intention of this first meeting is to let the bully know that this behavior has to change.
  • If the bully gets defensive let him or her know that there are more professional ways to respond.
  • Discuss professional options.

How to stop bullies in the workplace intervention #2:  Awareness Intervention

  • Collect data about bullying behavior.
  • Discuss how the quality of work is being disrupted.
  • Most people will adjust his or her behavior during this meeting.
  • There could be a blind spot with this bully and no one ever called it to his or her attention.

How to stop bullies in the workplace intervention #3:  Authority Intervention

  • Leaders develop an evaluation plan with accountability built-in when behaviors persist.
  • Expectations need to be clear.
  • What behaviors need to be improved?
  • What actions will happen if the bully doesn’t change?
  • A timeline is presented.

How to stop bullies in the workplace intervention #4:  Disciplinary Intervention

  • Talk to human resources and share your data.
  • The bully has been warned several times.
  • He or she “shouldn’t” be surprised with the outcome due to the clear expectations and previous interventions.

More thoughts from Joyce

As a career coach and communication strategist, I have seen the danger of bullies in the workplace when nothing is addressed.  It gets complicated when the boss is the bully!  Clients address their challenges and we explore powerful strategies.  Some of these strategies will be addressed in the next few videos.  Please visit my YouTube channel or connect with me on LinkedIn where I have posted numerous stories about having tough conversations with difficult people.

Please contact me at 800.713.1926 to explore options for working with me as your private coach.  Find your voice with Joyce is one of our new taglines.
Discover blind spots and how your communication impacts the success of your career.  All sessions are conducted on the phone to fit your schedule and budget.  The good news is that it usually only takes a few sessions to improve your communication skills.

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how your organization deals with bullies.  You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

Read More Here to learn how I can leverage my 30+ years as a career coach and communication strategist.
Kick Conflict to the Curb:  Get the respect you deserve! 😉

This is Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

 

Until next time, remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

P.S.  You will find the previous videos in the links below.  Be prepared to learn strategies that will take your communication skills to the next level.

Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1:  Facts about Bullies in the Workplace
Video #2:  Are you a Target for a Bully
Video #3:  Why Bullying Happens

 

 

 

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Video #3 in the Series Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace

#BulliesIntheworkplace  #bullies  #CommunicationStrategies

I have an important question for you:  What is done when bullies take over in your workplace?
Clients tell me that bullies in the workplace are not punished and thrive when there is no established rule.  No one in the company has the will to stop bullying!   Many times leaders just don’t know how to change this environment.  This is one of my motivations for creating this new video series.  All the 14 videos are perfect for you to share with your team.  They are short and each one has strategies for you to put to use right away.

Welcome to the video series – “Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace.”
This video will give you information on why bullies get away with their destructive behavior.

How companies can change a toxic environment with bullies in the workplace

  • Make enforcement procedures
  • Intervene
  • Education and training are critical
  • Start documenting complaints
  • Create a code of honor to be clear about accountability when bullies in the workplace take over

Most bullies would stop if rules change and bullies are held accountable with clear expectations from leadership.

More thoughts from Joyce on bullies in the workplace

I know that this topic is hitting home to many of my readers because they send me private emails about bullies in their life.  The last few videos in the series have dealt with the definition of a bully, are you a target, and not being victimized by bullies.  We need to look internally when we meet these difficult people and take the communication skills that we already have and put them out there.  Our new tag line is “find your voice with Joyce.”  People want to be heard and gain control back.  The next videos will have strategies on what your company can do and actual words you can say.  Stay tuned because there are 14 videos in the series.

Please watch the links below if you missed the intro and video #1 and #2.
Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1:  Facts about Bullies in the Workplace
Video #2:  Are you a Target for a Bully

I want to hear from you

Add a comment to my blog on how your company handles bullies in the workplace. You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please share this and any article that speaks to you or your company.

Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts. Help us help them reduce conflict and improve leadership skills and quality of life.

 

This is Joyce Weiss
Corporate Communication Strategist and Accountability Coach

Have a great week.

Until next time, remember…”You Get What You Tolerate!”

PS  Please watch the links below if you missed the intro and video #1 and #2.
Intro Video to Protecting Yourself from Bullies in the Workplace
Video #1:  Facts about Bullies in the Workplace
Video #2:  Are you a Target for a Bully

 

Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831