Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Queen of Conflict Resolution and Communication Coach

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March 30, 2021 By Joyce Weiss Leave a Comment

5 More Action Steps (16 – 20) to Reduce Drama and Stress

Hello, Dear Kick Conflict to the Curb Readers!

Are you ready for the last 5 action steps in the series to Kick Conflict to the Curb?

I hope that you’re using the strategies that you have been learning from these posts and videos and reducing your stress and drama at work and home!
If you have questions or need more details on any of the content, please reach out and send me an email:  HERE.  

This article is Part 4 in the series: 20 Action Steps to Kick Conflict to the Curb.
Here’s a link from Part 1 where you’ll find the first 5 strategies

Here’s a link from Part 2 where you’ll find action steps 6-10

Here’s a link from Part 3 where you’ll find action steps 11-15

 The action steps come from creating content for my virtual class and coaching clients.  If you want more information on any of the action steps, do a search in the search bar on this site: JoyceWeiss.com.

Action Steps #1: Clarify the boundaries

What boundaries do you need to set for yourself to achieve a better work/life balance?

It’s time to go deep and discover boundaries that you need to share with others who waste your valuable time.
I’m suggesting that you do this for home and work.  These days most of us are working at home and the boundaries are blurred.

I just had this conversation with a new neighbor, Randy.

Randy saw that I just returned from a bike ride as he was introducing himself to my husband.  Randy said, “Joyce, my wife can join you on the trails because she loves bike riding too.”

I need my space and quiet when I walk or bike ride since virtual training and coaching is all about me listening and talking!  Hey, not complaining… these are my facts. 🙂

I said, “Randy, thanks for suggesting this.  Let’s get together on the weekend to get to know each other.  I need quiet when I’m on my bike or walk since that is my time to relax.”  He totally got it and said, “Hey, I get this and respect you for sharing your truth.”

I think this is going to be a great new relationship.  I set boundaries while still being cordial so we can get to know each other better.

What boundaries do you need to set for yourself?

Action Steps #2:  Deal with Bullies bullies in the workplace |action steps| bullies at work | bullying in the workplace

Hold meetings to discuss how Different = Different.  Different does NOT Equal Wrong.
This seems so easy. It’s not, yet this statement says it all. It’s a great lesson that we are not all alike.  The idea is for all of us to get to know people at work who don’t look or sound like us.

Bullies are put in their place when they see leadership sharing the importance of accepting each other’s differences.

We don’t need to like or respect everyone at work.  The idea is how to get along even when we don’t like our colleagues. It’s a true test of strength.  Believe me when I share that this is so hard for me yet I know that it’s necessary in order to reduce the drama at work and home.

Action Steps #3: Pull Back and Don’t Push Back

Pull back when bullies attack you with sarcasm. What is the best way to respond so that you feel good about yourself?
You can even walk away from someone who harasses you with constant sarcasm or anger.

Please refer to this article on Verbal Aikido that goes into more detail on how you can master this strategy like a pro!

Action Steps #4: Get in the Gap- Your Safe Place action steps

Gain control in tough conversations taking a breath to decide how you want to respond. The Gap is in the middle of you thinking what to say and opening your mouth.
It’s an important strategy to use in your toolbox because it will help you from possibly saying something you wished you didn’t say.
Can you relate?  I sure can!

Here’s an article on THE GAP for more details.

Action Steps #5: Learn to Be Direct with Respect® 

You will see a dramatic improvement in communication when you learn Be Direct with Respect®

All you need to do is use the following formula:  I am_________when _______ because ________.

Here’s an example:  I am frustrated when we all agreed with the new code of conduct because some of the team are still getting to work late.
This statement is strong and you can then go deeper and ask for feedback on how to rectify this situation.

Let’s Stay Connected

Which Action Steps speak to you?  What does your organization do to reduce drama and stress at work?

Share your thoughts in the comment section below or send me an email HERE.

Continue being engaged as a Kick Conflict to the Curb Weekly Update member and start sharing your thoughts about the videos or articles.
Hey, Dear Readers, I’m here for you when you have questions about your own communication or relationship “challenges.”

Feel free to send me an email. Full disclosure here:
I don’t charge anything when people send me questions or comments via email. Staying connected is what it’s all about for me.

Have a Great Week!

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP, CVP
Master Coach
Queen of Conflict Resolution

Remember, You Get What YOU Tolerate!

 

Filed Under: action steps, The GAP, verbal aikido

June 23, 2020 By Joyce Weiss Leave a Comment

Video on a Powerful Communication Strategy to Protect You When You are Angry

Do you want to use a powerful communication strategy to protect you before you open your mouth?
Do you ever say something and wish you didn’t?

If so, you are not alone.
I will give you a communication strategy that will help you by saying something that you wish you didn’t say.

This video will show you how to control your words before you decide to say something.  Stay tuned, next week’s video will take you even deeper!

https://youtu.be/vUpdemYWgs8

 

Communication Strategy 1:  Quote from Norman Cousins norman cousins | communication strategy

American journalist, Norman Cousins said, Wisdom consists of the anticipation of consequences.

I just shared this communication strategy during an online communication program with a group of the chamber of commerce professionals.  They loved this communication strategy because it’s easy to use and they have stopped themselves from blurting out the wrong message.

Communication Strategy 2:  The GAP is an Important Tool

  • A stimulus is something that happens to us.  If someone interrupts you, the interruption is the stimulus.
  • The response is how we react after someone interrupts us.
  • THE GAP helps us make a choice on how we react.
  • Take a deep breath and step back for a moment.
  • We need to see the space between the stimulus and response instead of immediately talking.
  • Recognize when you are angry and get into the GAP.

Stay Connected with Me

Add a comment to my blog on how you deal with tough conversations and how you use the GAP.
You will receive a response from me because I enjoy connecting with my readers! 🙂  You are always welcome to send me a private email
with concerns that you are experiencing at work.

Please contact me at my cell 248.310.6998 or 800.713.1926 to explore how career coaching could be a great action step for your career development. There are many options to fit your budget and time schedule!   My last 4 clients have asked me to help them feel more comfortable with their public speaking skills.  It only takes a few sessions to make this happen.  Hey, what can I say?  I’m quick and clients use their new public speaking skills immediately.  A win/win for all.  🙂

Stay tuned!
Next week I will go deeper and share a motivational story about you going to an angry neighbor’s house to borrow a rake. It’s a great story so please come back to watch the video.

Do you want more information on how to resolve conflict or advance your career?
Sign up for articles, newsletters, and videos HERE

Until next time,

Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP
Career Coach and Communication Strategist

Have a great week.

Remember, YOU Get What YOU Tolerate!

PS Career Advancement is like riding a bike. Shift Gears from coasting to owning the road!
Find your voice with Joyce!

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Communication Strategies, The GAP
Tagged With: conflict in the workplace, how to improve communication skills

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Contact Joyce

Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831

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