Reducing conflict in the workplace is the most requested program from my clients. For those of you who have attended one of these powerful sessions, you may remember a phrase that I shared with you: You Get What You Tolerate. I always ask my audience to express what the phrase means to them. The discussion is usually about how we allow others to be disrespectful (bullies) or how we don’t confront poor behavior in meetings or in the workplace. That is if we don’t address the conflict directly and respectfully.
Hopefully, the 2 case scenarios below will address some of your concerns.
Conflict in the Workplace Scenario #1:
Dealing with a sarcastic person
You are speaking with your team and Sarcastic Sam constantly uses his negative words to discount a creative conversation. Remember, You Get what You Tolerate if you don’t have the tough conversation with Sam. Sam, says, “Here we go again, you know that these meetings are always a waste of time and nothing ever changes around here.” This is the time when you can say, “Nothing ever changes around here?” Repeating his sarcastic accusation may show Sam that his words are not accurate. Other team members may add to the conversation by reminding Sam about all of the changes.
Conflict in the Workplace Scenario #2:
Dealing with a rude person while listening to a presenter
You are in the audience listening to an interesting speaker and the person next to you continuously whispers to you that he is bored out of his mind. Remember, You Get What You Tolerate! You can keep silent and resent the interruption or you can say, “I don’t want to miss anything that the speaker is saying. I do want to hear his interesting message.” All you did was ask him to shut his mouth without being rude to him. I don’t want/I do want is worth practicing since it is a great way to start the conversation.
More Thoughts from Joyce to Reduce Conflict in the Workplace
It’s always a risk when we have tough conversations. That’s why I share my strategies in our communication toolbox. Repeat Sarcastic Sam’s exaggerations the next time he tries to bring the team down. This one tool is easy to use and may give you great results.
Another one of my favorite communication strategies is to make conversations safe by using I don’t want/I do want. Click Here to watch a video of mine on How to Improve Communication with Negative People from 2010. The information is current even though the quality of the video is not! 🙂 Hey, we all strive to get better!
The expression You Get What You Tolerate reminds my clients to respectfully have these tough conversations. It’s time to say these 5 little words when you are with a rude person or an interrupter.
I want to hear from you!
CLICK HERE to send me your questions about how to deal with the Sarcastic Sams at your workplace. What has your experience with them?
Do You Want to See How Your Communication Impacts Your Success at Work?
CLICK HERE to take the easy and fun Communicate with Impact Quiz. You will get your results immediately and learn more about setting boundaries to be more effective at work and in your life. Sound good?
Here’s the LINK
Until next time,
This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist and Coach
You can start tackling tough conversations with bullies, different generations, and even narcissists once you learn the powerful strategies. I will do whatever it takes to help you improve your quality of life.
Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, and online professional growth coaching.
Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!
See YOU Next Week.
PS Read more articles and listen to podcasts at our Conflict in the Workplace Knowledge Page https://www.joyceweiss.com/resources/knowledge-base/conflict-resolution-in-the-workplace/