Joyce Weiss

I work with organizations and individuals who want to kick conflict and chaos to the curb - Communication Strategist and Master Coach

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May 24, 2015 By Joyce Weiss 2 Comments

Travel Can be Dangerous: Select Compatable Companions

This new series on “Working with Jerks” is really speaking to many of you.  I have received more private emails about readers’ nightmares concerning difficult people in their personal and professional life.  Let’s see if you can relate with this story.  I will be asking you to share your ideas on how you would have handled the situation.

George’s Travel Nightmare

George went on a trip to Arizona with an alleged good friend of his…Jim.  George came down with the flu and could not participate in the side trips.  George had a high temperature and was upset that he could not partake in the activities.  Here comes the DRAMA!  Can you guess what Jim said to George?  If you guessed that he was sensitive to George’s situation, you are wrong.  Each day Jim said, “George you missed such great experiences.    I can’t believe that you wasted your time sleeping instead of pushing yourself.”  This trip ended a good relationship.  George saw another side of Jim.  He could not continue being Jim’s friend after Jim showed such insensitivity. 

Joyce, What Do You Think?

I spoke to George a few times to make sure that I understood exactly what happened.  I asked him if Jim was just sharing his excitement about his experience and missed his friend.  George told me that Jim was been insensitive and was not concerned at all.  I do realize that there are always 3 sides of every story…George’s side, Jim’s side, and the other side!  If I interviewed Jim, I probably would have heard a totally different explanation. We don’t see how others see us.  This is usually the largest communication breakdown.  George told me that he “should have” spoken to Jim while on the trip.  I suggested that he could still have that tough conversation.  George does not want to continue the friendship. 

I recently went on a vacation with friends and we constantly teased each other about how we don’t see ourselves as others do.  Humor worked with us because we all got into the action.  No one was singled out like Jim did to George.  It’s your turn to share what you would have done in this situation.

What Would You Do If You Were George? 

Would you …  
       Stay silent and not bring this up to Jim?
       Become sarcastic and say something like,  “You are an insensitive jerk.”

Or, would you say, “I don’t want to create stress between us.  I do want to clear the air.  I was  caught off guard when  I  heard the comments about how much I missed while I had the flu.  Those comments didn’t help me one bit.  I felt bad enough that I missed all of the excitement.”

CLICK HERE to watch a short video on my blog, “Why You Have to Run Away From Negatoids.”

 I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your thoughts on what you would have done in a similar situation.  I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own communication issues and conflict in the workplace.

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 PS  Click HERE to watch a short video on my blog, “Why You Have to Run Away From Negatoids.”

Filed Under: Communication, Communication Skills, Communication Strategist, Conflict and Resolution Specialist, Improving Communication, Internal stress
Tagged With: Communication, constructive feedback, resolve conflict and interpersonal issues

May 17, 2015 By Joyce Weiss 2 Comments

When You Work With a Jerk Story #4

 

conflict frustrated lady putting paper to her headHave you ever worked in an environment that seemed more like high school…with bullies, rolling eyes, gossip mongers, and mean kids? I help my clients turn their toxic environment around and help them feel comfortable during tough conversations.  This post describes an email that I received from one of my loyal readers after he read several of the past posts on working with a jerk.  I did not make this up!  Names were changed to protect the innocent. 🙂

Todd’s Story
Todd is a sales rep for a mid sized firm.  He received a promotion for selling the most products in the company for the first quarter.  The leaders wrote Todd’s name on a huge recognition board in the lunch room.  Can you guess what happened next?  If you guessed that someone erased Todd’s name from the board…you are correct!  The horrific part is that no one at Todd’s firm addressed this mean spirited act. 

What Would You Do if You Were Todd’s Boss?
Click HERE to send me your ideas on what you would do.  By now, you can probably predict what I would suggest.  The leaders need to call an all employee meeting to address the negative behavior.  This cannot be tolerated because the culture needs to be positive and the team needs to support each other.  I hear many horror stories on negativity that is allowed in the workplace.  Leaders don’t always know how to break this cycle.  A negative culture needs to be addressed with either training on communication or conflict. 

I Want to Hear From You!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own communication “issues.”

Want to Share or Use This Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article.  Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Communication Strategist

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

Filed Under: bullying in the workplace, Coaching as a Leader, Communication, Communication Skills, Communication Strategist, Conflict in the Workplace, Improving Communication
Tagged With: bullying in the workplace, Communication, conflict in the workplace, employee morale

May 3, 2015 By Joyce Weiss Leave a Comment

“Trying” to Communicate with Younger Generations

ask all generations to help 8One of my clients sent me a question about a conflict that he was experiencing.  Let’s see if this sounds familiar with some of you. 🙂
He felt that social media was impacting the social and communication skills for his 15 year old son.  He was  concerned because his son had a difficult time speaking at dinner or with the family.  Of course this is typical of teenagers anyway.  There is something that goes even deeper.

So Joyce, What Do You Think?

Think about it for a moment.  When teens text with their friends, they can edit their comments if necessary.  I wish that we could edit our verbal communication at those times when we make huge communication mistakes!  People who text need to use their mouth to communicate also or else this could be a huge issue in their future.  People need to get along with others in the workplace or else there will be huge conflict.  Face to face communication is something that we all need to improve upon.  Texting is great.  I love using it especially if I want to stay in touch with my family.  Texting along with verbal communication work well for me!  I’m not saying anything that is new here but I decided to bring this up because I’m hearing more discussion about this issue. 

What about you

1.  Do you see verbal communication go down the tube with younger generations?
2. How have you successfully handled this?
3. What challenges do you still have when you are attempting to have a conversation with a text-aholic?

This is your chance to vent and express your frustrations so we can all learn from each other.
I want to hear from you.
Click HERE to respond to any of the questions above.

Click Here to watch a short video on Communicating with Different Generations

 I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Business Conflict Resolution Consultant

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

 Click Here to watch a short video on Communicating with Different Generations

 

 

Filed Under: Communication, Communication Skills, Conflict in the Workplace, Generations in the Workplace, How to Improve Communication in the Workplace, Improving Communication
Tagged With: effective communication, Generations in the Workplace, how to improve communication skills, personal development

April 26, 2015 By Joyce Weiss 4 Comments

Working With a Jerk: Story #3

mean man pointing fingerThis is the 3rd article on the topic Working With a Jerk.  There will be more stories on this topic because my readers have been sending me private messages describing their experiences.  I have enough examples to cover 6 months of articles!  You will receive more examples along with the other topics on resolving conflict in the workplace.  Are you ready for this week’s true story?  I hope so because it is another unbelievable one.

Janis and her mom work together in a mid sized company.  Jim is a colleague of theirs and is known for his sarcastic and biting words.  Janis, her mom and Jim were talking at lunch when Jim pointed his finger at Janis and said,  “Janis your hair cut suits you and your outfits are very professional…not like your mom’s outfits.”  Did you catch your breath?  Yes, this did actually happen!

I have four questions for you:

1.  What would you say to Jim if you were Janis?

2.  What would you say to Jim if you were Janis’ mother?

3.  What would you do if you were Jim’s boss and you heard this conversation?

4.  What story do you have about working for a jerk? 

I want to hear from you! 🙂

Click HERE to tell me how you would react and what you would say. 

Joyce, What Do You Think?

If I were Janis I would step back after the shock wore off and say something.  We don’t always have to say things immediately.  It is smart to back off and plan a strategy at times.  “I was caught off guard” is my favorite phrase to use when I speak to someone the next day. 
“Jim, I was caught off guard when I heard those mean comments about my mom when she was standing right next to us.  My mom and I were surprised about such insensitive words.”  This way you are setting up a boundary for Jim and “hopefully” he will think before he opens up his mouth again.  If he repeats his insensitive comments, I would do my best to stay away from him.  He will chose someone else to ridicule.

Click HERE if you want to read Working With a Jerk story #1.

I want to hear from you!

CLICK HERE to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at ConflictInTheWorkplace.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please CLICK HERE to Leave a Comment or Question

Send me any comments that you may have about this article. Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Business Conflict Resolution Consultant

I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me (800.713.1926) concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

Click HERE if you want to read Working With a Jerk story #1.

Filed Under: bullying in the workplace, Communication, Communication Skills, Conflict in the Workplace, How to Improve Communication in the Workplace
Tagged With: bullying in the workplace, Communication, how to improve communication skills

February 15, 2015 By Joyce Weiss 2 Comments

What Happens When Someone is Negative Towards You?

Has this ever happened to you? conflict business man being blamed

A person comes up to you and says, “What’s up with that outfit?” or “Why are you always so quiet?  or “Why are you always so talkative?” I’m sure that some of you are saying, “Joyce, of course that has happened to me!” My question to you is…What have you said or done when people express these statements to you?

Do you…
Suffer in silence?
Give a sarcastic remark?
Become defensive?

I need to make myself clear. I have stayed silent, gave sarcastic remarks, and became defensive. That’s right my loyal readers, even the Be Direct with Respect® Queen gets caught off guard at times. I was in shock when people said things like this to me. I didn’t know how to respond. It was like being with the mean girl or boy in high school!

Watch a short video below at a recent training on The Power Talk Formula.

So Joyce, How can I handle this?
The first thing to do is to step back for a brief moment (The Gap) and think about what you want to say.
This brief time helps you gain control especially if you were NOT expecting such a comment. Do you want to put the other person down (not recommended) or respond in a respectful way? (Recommended)

Here are 5 options to put in your communication tool box.
1. “What do you mean?” This takes the ball from you and puts it back in their bully hands.

2. “This outfit?” You are in control and gain strength by not defending yourself and becoming defensive.

3. “Always silent?” or “Always talkative?” This usually shows the other person that he or she is exaggerating.

4. Change subjects. That’s right. You read this correctly. I don’t need to have someone control a conversation if someone is mean. I actually have said, “So have you seen that latest movie on…?” I usually get a look from the sarcastic one. I don’t really care. I do want to move on and not get into a screaming match!

5.  The Be Direct with Respect® Response is the one that I use most of the times. “I am surprised when I heard this comment about my communication because I welcome constructive feedback and not sarcasm.”

I realize that some of you may think that these options are either too weak or too strong. We all deal with conflict in different ways. The most important idea is for you to think about how you want to react when and if someone “picks” on you. Do your best not to get defensive.

Let me know how you have gained control when someone was sarcastic to you. I will send you a booklet “19 Secrets for Successfully Navigating Life’s Potholes, Ruts and Obstacles.”

I want to hear from you!

Click Here to send me your questions or concerns. I enjoy hearing from my readers plus they get their questions answered. Let me know what topics you want me to write about concerning your own conflict in the workplace “issues.”

Want to share or use this Article in Your Newsletter or on Your Website?

Of course! You are welcome to print this, and any other articles we send, if you use the following byline:
A recognized expert on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace, Joyce Weiss, M.A., CSP is an author, accountability coach, and a Certified Speaking Professional. To book Joyce to speak at your event or company call: 800.713.1926 or email: Joyce@JoyceWeiss.com
Visit her website at JoyceWeiss.com to sign up for your own FREE video series and Communicate with Impact Weekly to Resolve Conflict in the Workplace.

Please Click Here to Leave a Comment or Question

Please send me any comments that you may have about this article.  Loyal readers like you help us find more people who could benefit from these posts to reduce conflict at the workplace and home. There may be someone in your life who is feeling stressed out…who could benefit from the inspiration and knowledge on improving their working condition or home life. Let them know about the “Communicate with Impact Weekly” so they can sign up for their own weekly articles.

Until next time,

This is Joyce Weiss, Business Conflict Resolution Consultant
I help people become top level leaders who get GREAT results.
How do I do this?
I teach them to tackle the tough conversations with bullies and negative people to build employee engagement, accountability, and rock star performance…
The Result? My clients resolve their conflict and they get a better night’s sleep!

Feel free to call me concerning your own team/executive retreats, workshops, on line professional growth coaching, and keynote speeches.

Remember…You Get What YOU Tolerate!

See YOU Next Week.

PS Click Here to sign up for my Free Video Series on Resolving Conflict in the Workplace

 

Filed Under: Communication, Communication Skills, Conflict in the Workplace, Dealing with Complainers, How to Improve Communication in the Workplace
Tagged With: constructive feedback, how to improve communication skills, resolve conflict and interpersonal issues

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Email: joyce@joyceweiss.com
Phone: 248-681-5831

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